What man would accept that kind of clause?

[Homerlilian]

Look, I didn’t watch the video. The wealth part is ridiculous and I’ve never heard any scholar say it’s acceptable. But the no polygamous clause is normal when it comes to an instant divorce.

Angelina stop stressing it abayo if the deen allows it that means Allah has given us that right . No need to get defensive about it if a man wants a second that’s his god given right .

 

[Angelina]

Angelina stop stressing it abayo if the deen allows it that means Allah has given us that right . No need to get defensive about it if a man wants a second that’s his god given right .

And if the deen allows a woman to put in a polygamy clause, don’t stress about it walalo. It’s a woman’s God even right.

 

[Homerlilian]

And if the deen allows a woman to put in a polygamy clause, don’t stress about it walalo. It’s a woman’s God even right.

Not trying offend anybody Walalo but I’m seeing it in my family and here how these females move so salty they get mad about it and come up with some new way to prevent it . Either way if that’s the case fairs than if it’s you’re god given right to have polygamy clause

 

[Angelina]

Not trying offend anybody Walalo but I’m seeing it in my family and here how these females move so salty they get mad about it and come up with some new way to prevent it . Either way if that’s the case fairs than if it’s you’re god given right to have polygamy clause

Lol it’s not new. If anything It doesn’t happen as much as it used to in the early days of Islam. This contact is going back to how many early Muslim women used to operate.

It’s our God given right indeed. It needs to be revived like the way it was in the medieval period.

 

[Sophisticate]

There are also prenuptial agreements, you know.

You cannot take a 'leap of faith' and assume that someone will remain the same. You do not know them or what they are capable of. Only time will reveal that. You could still come from a two-parent home with loving parents in a monogamous marriage and have a trauma-free upbringing and still not have the same fate as your parents in marriage.
Blind faith in someone else won't cut it; some people will tell you what you want to hear and then retroactively change their minds or blatantly lie to achieve an end. The notion that people are somehow immune from this is not true. You cannot always 'know better' or 'do better' when someone else gives incomplete or inaccurate information. It is better to be transparent than to trap someone into a lifestyle they never wanted. I see nothing wrong with protecting oneself.

 

[NomadicWarlord]

Dont listen to what that lil girl was saying she only tryna be a clout chaser lol

 

[Angelina]

There are also prenuptial agreements, you know.

You cannot take a 'leap of faith' and assume that someone will remain the same. You do not know them or what they are capable of. Only time will reveal that. You could still come from a two-parent home with loving parents in a monogamous marriage and have a trauma-free upbringing and still not have the same fate as your parents in marriage.
Blind faith in someone else won't cut it; some people will tell you what you want to hear and then retroactively change their minds or blatantly lie to achieve an end. The notion that people are somehow immune from this is not true. You cannot always 'know better' or 'do better' when someone else gives incomplete or inaccurate information. It is better to be transparent than to trap someone into a lifestyle they never wanted. I see nothing wrong with protecting oneself.

Oh no sis, you’re a bad woman if you dare to use your logic and not engage in blind faith and therefore aren’t wife material.

 

[DojaKhat]

Dont listen to what that lil girl was saying she only tryna be a clout chaser lol

Why don't you focus on what you're going to pursue in place of a college degree, instead of speaking on grown folks business?

 

[3LetterzMM]

How would dat even get enforced tho you'd need proof otherwise it's her word vs his which da nigga will 1000% deny lol especially wit da bread onda line like mans already cheated it's not above him to lie about it after the fact at dat point

 

[Sophisticate]

Oh no sis, you’re a bad woman if you dare to use your logic and not engage in blind faith and therefore aren’t wife material.

I'm a pragmatist. People must plan for what life could potentially give them. My understanding of a marital relationship is 'duty-bound,' where 'lifelong and complete fidelity' must be upheld. This is mutually understood and codified, underscoring commitment, fairness, and accountability. If this contract is breached, then termination and compensation of some sort are in order. If a man wishes to pursue his desires at the expense of this contract, then there was no love, to begin with, but a grand facade indicative of an opportunistic man who does not share my values and is at odds with my standards and what I saw growing up.

 

[Abdisamad]

she’s totally right and I am absolutely gonna do this. the man I marry should not take another wife, so it shouldn’t be an issue for him. imagine going through childbirth, even multiple times, for a man, and he leaves you for another woman while you’re supposed to sit there and look dumb. no way i’d rather mop the ocean floor

Lool. What man would sign on such a shitty contract

 

[Abdisamad]

Oh no sis, you’re a bad woman if you dare to use your logic and not engage in blind faith and therefore aren’t wife material.

Xalimos trying to predict if their future husband will take a second wife...

 

[Kane]

It’s s in a woman’s right to ask for such a contract, minus the financial clause she added.

If you step back though, what does it actually say about the woman’s self confidence and her perception of you.

Terms and conditions are only applied by women as a form of compliance/competency test (aka sh!t test) to determine wether you’re a pushover or a man of principle.


Giving a women certainty or your obedience is not only feminine but it’s an attraction killer.

If your words alone don’t suffice than what kind of marriage can you have with such a woman, and wouldn’t her lack of trust make you doubtful of her as well.

 

[Angelina]

It’s s in a woman’s right to ask for such a contract, minus the financial clause she added.

If you step back though, what does it actually say about the woman’s self confidence and her perception of you.

Terms and conditions are only applied by women as a form of compliance/competency test (aka sh!t test) to determine wether you’re a pushover or a man of principle.


Giving a women certainty or your obedience is not only feminine but it’s an attraction killer.

If your words alone don’t suffice than what kind of marriage can you have with such a woman, and wouldn’t her lack of trust make you doubtful of her as well.

Why would a logical woman take a man’s word at face value when men can change and evolve? A man that doesn’t want a second wife now at twenty-something, might have a change of heart at 40

I wish some of you men understoood that many women are logical and are motivated based on what benefits them. Marriage is a contract, hence why would a woman not care about terms and conditions? Men need to let go of the idea that every woman doesn’t have boundaries for the man she wants. Some women simply love themselves more and they tend to be the smart ones who have high sense of self esteem.

One thing I’ve noticed, men love to use concepts like ‘love’ and ‘trust’ when it comes to talking women out of using their rationality and understanding that marriage is a lot more than that.

 

[Lightshow]

Nothing wrong with the clause. If you don't like it, just leave the woman. It is that simple.

 

[Kane]

Why would a logical woman take a man’s word at face value when men can change and evolve? A man that doesn’t want a second wife now at twenty-something, might have a change of heart at 40

That’s why, I would advice women to seek out men, who practice radical honesty.

And to built the confidence and the emotional fortitude to receive the truth as it is given. Irrespective of how it makes them feel.

instead of rejecting the bitter truth, for the sweet comforting lie, only to turn around and weep and whine about what liars men are. That would be my idea of logic!!!

I wish some of you men understoood that many women are logical and are motivated based on what benefits them.

Being motivated by self interest is not logical my dear Angie it’s instinctual, it’s primitive and it always ends in failure. Like all the relationships that are built on its foundation.

Marriage is a contract, hence why would a woman not care about terms and conditions? Men need to let go of the idea that every woman doesn’t have boundaries for the man she wants. Some women simply love themselves more and they tend to be the smart ones who have high sense of self esteem.

A woman should have rights, preferences, needs, boundaries and standards. Not terms, conditions and demands.

The idea of loving oneself is rooting in western ideology, which has no basis in Islam, it’s actually narcissistic.

And I’m sure you are aware that narcissism is a coping mechanism for low self esteem individuals.

But respecting, caring for and protecting your mental health, your emotional well being and your self image. It not only acceptable its a must.

One thing I’ve noticed, men love to use concepts like ‘love’ and ‘trust’ when it comes to talking women out of using their rationality and understanding that marriage is a lot more than that.

Men who verbally over express love are either manipulators or inexperienced, but surely all relationships both professional and personal are founded on trust.

marriage = service + obligation + leisure + salsa or tango which ever tickles your fancy.

without trust you’re forced to question every single action, statement the other makes, what rational human being wants to live like that?

 

[Vapour]

There are also prenuptial agreements, you know.

You cannot take a 'leap of faith' and assume that someone will remain the same. You do not know them or what they are capable of. Only time will reveal that. You could still come from a two-parent home with loving parents in a monogamous marriage and have a trauma-free upbringing and still not have the same fate as your parents in marriage.
Blind faith in someone else won't cut it; some people will tell you what you want to hear and then retroactively change their minds or blatantly lie to achieve an end. The notion that people are somehow immune from this is not true. You cannot always 'know better' or 'do better' when someone else gives incomplete or inaccurate information. It is better to be transparent than to trap someone into a lifestyle they never wanted. I see nothing wrong with protecting oneself.

Pragmatism can sometimes manifest as suspicion that stops you and the other person from feeling at ease, killing a budding relationship (whether at the marriage stage or not). There's only so much you can do tbh (not strawmanning here, just saying). Eventually, you'll have to accept the risk. Trust + signs of genuine attraction at the start = long married life (oversimplification but yh). Might be stupid. But people should be willing to be stupid.

 

[Adeer_Boomer]

A dayuu simp would and there are plenty of them.

 

[NomadicWarlord]

Why don't you focus on what you're going to pursue, instead of speaking on grown folks business?

Nah I aint have no interest in getting sum useless piece of paper you just mad that I got more clout than you

 

[Vapour]

That’s why, I would advice women to seek out men, who practice radical honesty.

And to built the confidence and the emotional fortitude to receive the truth as it is given. Irrespective of how it makes them feel.

instead of rejecting the bitter truth, for the sweet comforting lie, only to turn around and weep and whine about what liars men are. That would be my idea of logic!!!



Being motivated by self interest is not logical my dear Angie it’s instinctual, it’s primitive and it always ends in failure. Like all the relationships that are built on its foundation.





A woman should have rights, preferences, needs, boundaries and standards. Not terms, conditions and demands.

The idea of loving oneself is rooting in western ideology, which has no basis in Islam, it’s actually narcissistic.

And I’m sure you are aware that narcissism is a coping mechanism for low self esteem individuals.

But respecting, caring for and protecting your mental health, your emotional well being and your self image. It not only acceptable its a must.




Men who verbally over express love are either manipulators or inexperienced, but surely all relationships both professional and personal are founded on trust.

marriage = service + obligation + leisure + salsa or tango which ever tickles your fancy.

without trust you’re forced to question every single action, statement the other makes, what rational human being wants to live like that?

Should be a 95-5 ratio in terms of Trust vs Doubt. If you are going to be with someone for 50 odd years, even the slightest misgiving can snowball into a major problem that ends the relationship.

It’s just like smoking. The harm from smoking one cigarette today is low, but that damage snowballs fast over 30 years.