What happens a a somali woman marries into a new culture...

I know some women married into more “traditional” cultures than ours like afghan/arab and have troubles in their marriage because their husbands think they are too “aggressive” and run around like they are single.

Actually, I think I’m most cultures, even western, marriage is seen as settling down and losing a bit of freedom, whereas in ours, the women practically aren’t married and raise the kids alone. I can see how a girl who grew up in that would greatly hate the restraints and not be able to put up with the suffocation of a husband.
 

CaliTedesse

I ❤️ Islam & Aabo Kush. Anti-BBB Anti-Inbred
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Well that’s mainly because from a young age they are taught they have to “do it all” it’s like some kind of badge of honor
Hnmmmmmm I don't believe so I have this feeling it has to do with genetics and baruur because I noticed the more baruur the more aggressive they are.
 
Hnmmmmmm I don't believe so I have this feeling it has to do with genetics and baruur because I noticed the more baruur the more aggressive they are.
It’s not genetics, it’s just how you’re raised to think. And there are a lot of aggressive skinny ones too, it’s a matter of lifestyle
 
Iman and Ayan Hersi both had successful intercultural marriages and there are many more who did it successfully. These people dated for a while before they settled down with one another and therefore know what the other person ticks and their expectations. These men that they married are individualistic and their families have no say to approve their union or otherwise. The focus of modern intercultural marriages between Muslims is based on halal sex. There are huge parental and familial expectations to be accomodated. Beyond the halal sex, a weak foundation holds their marriages together and when conflicts arise between them or from family displeasure and pressure, it’s failure is often condemned as a cultural differences. Marry someone you know very well and know their family’s expectations. Ask them and his parents their expectations (Somali parents too). When conflicts between the girl and his family become unavoidable, the most common mistakes people (girls) make is the ultimatum they give to these blokes to choose them over their families. It breaks down.

Somalispot’s marriage counsellor.
 
Somali girls are atypical in the sense that they actually want to get married for the freedom it provides them. Most of them are on house arrest and burdened with chores so they look forward to marriage to escape the restrictions placed on them by their mothers. That's why they face so much difficulty in marriages with partners from more oppressive cultures like Arabs and South Asians.
 

Mercury

Staff Member
Moderator
Well that’s mainly because from a young age they are taught they have to “do it all” it’s like some kind of badge of honor
That’s what I wanted to say a lot somali girls are accustomed to this way where they do all the chores and only rely on their self without any help
 
Somali girls are atypical in the sense that they actually want to get married for the freedom it provides them. Most of them are on house arrest and burdened with chores so they look forward to marriage to escape the restrictions placed on them by their mothers. That's why they face so much difficulty in marriages with partners from more oppressive cultures like Arabs and South Asians.
I personally feel this. My mum is currently abroad, visiting her family. She left me with my dad and three siblings who can’t do shit for themselves. It really does feel like house arrest. Although I would never trade one prison for another. I plan to move out on my own and live freely without burdens or restrictions, and not be tied to anyone, whether they be parents, a husband or siblings.
 
I personally feel this. My mum is currently abroad, visiting her family. She left me with my dad and three siblings who can’t do shit for themselves. It really does feel like house arrest. Although I would never trade one prison for another. I plan to move out on my own and live freely without burdens or restrictions, and not be tied to anyone, whether they be parents, a husband or siblings.
Would your parents allow you to live on your own?
 

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