i did not say anything about "leaving children dry", rather this idea of children abandoning their parents when they reach adulthood.
Somali husband stole money from his wife to finance his side chick in somalia
- Thread starter Mr steal your naag 2
- Start date
Children do leave their parent's home, to start their own families. The only time that Somali parents live with their children is if they are very old or infirm. We're not like Hindi who live in one home with 3/4 generations.
i had a different childhood then.
Odious Delirium
VIP
When will this generational trauma cycle end?
And to all the relatively young ladies here are the vast majority of the faraxs in your age group/generation ditching the women around you and robbing them of there money to finance more kids and wives or are we just sensationalising the story of the few and old?
And for you relatively young faraxs are any of you planning on following in the footsteps of the men of your abos generation?
All I can say on this is that the younger somali men and women of today are radically different but not necessarily for the better. Looks to me like this wheel is gonna keep on spinning. Maybe in the other direction but spinning non the less instead of being broken like it's meant to be by the new gen.
Once again @AbdiFreedom your right. The vast majority of somali men and women are simply unfit to marry unless they change there mindset/mentality but most are far too gone for that.
Most are better off staying single or going for those they don't hold resentment and preconceived generational grudges and notions against like they do for there fellow somalis simply for being somali men or women.
And to all the relatively young ladies here are the vast majority of the faraxs in your age group/generation ditching the women around you and robbing them of there money to finance more kids and wives or are we just sensationalising the story of the few and old?
And for you relatively young faraxs are any of you planning on following in the footsteps of the men of your abos generation?
All I can say on this is that the younger somali men and women of today are radically different but not necessarily for the better. Looks to me like this wheel is gonna keep on spinning. Maybe in the other direction but spinning non the less instead of being broken like it's meant to be by the new gen.
Once again @AbdiFreedom your right. The vast majority of somali men and women are simply unfit to marry unless they change there mindset/mentality but most are far too gone for that.
Most are better off staying single or going for those they don't hold resentment and preconceived generational grudges and notions against like they do for there fellow somalis simply for being somali men or women.
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This. So much advice being thrown ITT are under the assumption that the de-facto state of marriage will end in abuse andor neglect. Shit is wild wallahi and just reeks of poor upbringingWhen will this generational trauma cycle end?
And to all the relatively young ladies here are the vast majority of the faraxs in your age group/generation ditching the women around you and robbing them of there money to finance more kids and wives or are we just sensationalising the story of the few and old?
And for you relatively young faraxs are any of you planning on following in the footsteps of the men of your abos generation?
All I can say on this is that the younger somali men and women of today are radically different but not necessarily for the better. Looks to me like this wheel is gonna keep on spinning. Maybe in the other direction but spinning non the less instead of being broken like it's meant to be by the new gen.
Once again @AbdiFreedom your right. The vast majority of somali men and women are simply unfit to marry unless they change there mindset/mentality but most are far too gone for that.
When will this generational trauma cycle end?
And to all the relatively young ladies here are the vast majority of the faraxs in your age group/generation ditching the women around you and robbing them of there money to finance more kids and wives or are we just sensationalising the story of the few and old?
And for you relatively young faraxs are any of you planning on following in the footsteps of the men of your abos generation?
All I can say on this is that the younger somali men and women of today are radically different but not necessarily for the better. Looks to me like this wheel is gonna keep spinning. Maybe in the other direction but spinning non the less instead of being broken like it's meant to be by the new gen.
Once again @AbdiFreedom your right. The vast majority of Somali men and women are simply unfit to marry unless they change there mindset/mentality but most are far to gone for that.
That story sounds familiar. It was the same experience a Somalispot user's mother had living in Canada back in 2015 or 2016.
There is a lot of generational trauma. It's not to the extreme level of the Native Indigenous people in the new world but it's still concerning.
Odious Delirium
VIP
I don't think it has anything to do with upbringing. somali Men and women of all walks of life hold these sentiments against the opposite gender.
This is the wayWhen will this generational trauma cycle end?
And to all the relatively young ladies here are the vast majority of the faraxs in your age group/generation ditching the women around you and robbing them of there money to finance more kids and wives or are we just sensationalising the story of the few and old?
And for you relatively young faraxs are any of you planning on following in the footsteps of the men of your abos generation?
All I can say on this is that the younger somali men and women of today are radically different but not necessarily for the better. Looks to me like this wheel is gonna keep on spinning. Maybe in the other direction but spinning non the less instead of being broken like it's meant to be by the new gen.
Once again @AbdiFreedom your right. The vast majority of somali men and women are simply unfit to marry unless they change there mindset/mentality but most are far too gone for that.
Most are better off staying single or going for those they don't hold resentment and preconceived generational grudges and notions against like they do for there fellow somalis simply for being somali men or women.
It 100% does. People that grow up with good role models usually tend to be more friendly and trusting of others compared to those that grew up in dysfunctional households, at least in my experience that's the case.
Odious Delirium
VIP
If you ask most of the people who hold negative sentiments about the opposite gender. Most tend to have normal upbringings and blame the state and dysfunction of others for there opinions aswell as citing stories like these sad case to justify there positions. Farax also do the same thing with there preconceived notions of xalimos and post crazy stuff to push a narrative and get everyone on board with there delusions.
Just hearing negative things for a long enough time is "validating" for many to feel this way no matter there upbringing.
Wether they have personally experienced it or not doesn't really matter aslong as there are those around them who hold these opinions and are constantly fanning the flames. The root cause is obviously dysfunctional households effect by such gender issues but if your hanging around dysfunctional people there opinions, views and state will have some sort of effect on you one way or the other no matter how good your upbringing is for many. Not everyone can control their generalising inner demon especially when the issue is very close to home so expectations are higher and fuses are shorter. When your supposed to be more lenient with your own people.
That's why I say most shouldn't get married.
No one exclaimed that some younger Abdis were the spitting image of their dysfunctional fathers or that they would repeat this. However, one should watch out for the effects this has on his children. Anyway, it was merely telling that some of the responses were (1) exclaiming this story was manufactured, (2) having a slap-on-the-wrist approach to a father like this, or (3) speaking about the virtues of polygamy and encouraging it often from a perverted sexual lens.
We should accept that some people have fractured families and fathers who are emotionally absent or physically unavailable. Let's not attempt to undermine this segment of Somalis just because we have not lived their lives. Some people are legitimately incapable of loving anyone, whether their children or spouse. Are they the majority? Probably not, and there is no way to tell. It's not like we have actual data.
There never seems to be a discussion of the negative ramifications of polygamy, such as a higher prevalence of divorce among polygamous families, which are five times higher than their monogamous counterparts. There is little talk of jealousy, lack of trust, unhappiness, loneliness, unequal financial division, and unequal social privileges among women in plural marriages. What of the psychosocial, familial and economic problems of those in plural vs. monogamous families? Along with the psychological costs on the first wife and children from that marriage, be they boys or girls. I noticed a tendency to view this through glowing terms among some male SSpot members.
In the case of financial exploitation, it happens though certain conditions facilitate it, like psychosocial factors (the personality and character of the spouse) and unquestioningly trusting the husband with one's resources. I recall cases where the mother significantly contributes to the home and the father may not. Or if he does, due to an untrusting nature, he is not transparent about his finances, which he may direct to establishing another family overseas. As we know, not all Somali men are created equally. Some are better men than others; no one here is creating a monolithic narrative. They were merely discussing this issue of an exploitive husband who uses his wife to engage in polygamy, which isn't some fanciful creation but does exist even though it's in the margins.
We should accept that some people have fractured families and fathers who are emotionally absent or physically unavailable. Let's not attempt to undermine this segment of Somalis just because we have not lived their lives. Some people are legitimately incapable of loving anyone, whether their children or spouse. Are they the majority? Probably not, and there is no way to tell. It's not like we have actual data.
There never seems to be a discussion of the negative ramifications of polygamy, such as a higher prevalence of divorce among polygamous families, which are five times higher than their monogamous counterparts. There is little talk of jealousy, lack of trust, unhappiness, loneliness, unequal financial division, and unequal social privileges among women in plural marriages. What of the psychosocial, familial and economic problems of those in plural vs. monogamous families? Along with the psychological costs on the first wife and children from that marriage, be they boys or girls. I noticed a tendency to view this through glowing terms among some male SSpot members.
In the case of financial exploitation, it happens though certain conditions facilitate it, like psychosocial factors (the personality and character of the spouse) and unquestioningly trusting the husband with one's resources. I recall cases where the mother significantly contributes to the home and the father may not. Or if he does, due to an untrusting nature, he is not transparent about his finances, which he may direct to establishing another family overseas. As we know, not all Somali men are created equally. Some are better men than others; no one here is creating a monolithic narrative. They were merely discussing this issue of an exploitive husband who uses his wife to engage in polygamy, which isn't some fanciful creation but does exist even though it's in the margins.
Odious Delirium
VIP
I'm talking in general. Pushing Monolithic narratives is what seems to be the norm alongside how to deal with and combat the opposite gender and all there "evil".
it isn't limited to this specific discussion. This is just one of the many types of example used to validate the negative feeling within the community based of generational trauma.
The points being made against men like that father aswell as in general the ramifications of how polygamy is being done by some guy are valid but my point was that we are radically different from the generations most of these complaints and issues are about and adopting the baggage and coming with it into a new relationship because the individual happens to be somali is probably why we got a lot of fast divorces in the west is my hypothesis on that issue aswell as part of the reason why marriages might last longer with ajnabis because somalis don't go into those with there trauma baggage and preconceived notions about there counterpart when their not somali.
i wouldn't limit it to somali, I would say most people are not fit or marriage
Odious Delirium
VIP
Yeah but I'm just talking in the context of somalis since this is a somali space.
yh but the problem is, 1.this thread isn't private and ajnabis are defo reading thing thinking "look at these somalis they do this and that" 2 i dont want to push out a narrative that somalis are unfit for marriage but idealise every other race as if they have better marriages than us
278k views it is so over
Odious Delirium
VIP
Alhamdullilah we do not have the likes of modeen amongst.
Just imagine the guy was somali with that sort of platform. That would truly be rep damaging more then anything we have faced over the past 30 years.
In the grand scheme of things somalis alhamdullilah have it better then most
if there was somali mo deen you have to exterminate him from society, deport
him to some island somewhere with no access to electricity and clear all data and files of his existence
Odious Delirium
VIP
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