Excerpt (translated more or less) from one of Dr Kanwal Kaisser’s speeches on Marriage (my notes are in brackets).
and He placed between you love and mercy.” (30:21)
When we love someone, look in your own home. Suppose you love your friend. What do you do? Your friend came to your house. You really love her. Or she is your cousin. You say we are childhood friends. We were always together. You tell the whole world how much you love her. She came to visit you and threw her shawl on the sofa.
What will you do? Doesn’t she know she doesn’t throw her shawl there?
If the husband did the same thing, what do we do? We are not able to tolerate this. We look into one’s own life someone else whom we love, we accommodate so much. We overlook so much, don’t make issues over small things. Because in the relationship between husband and wife the devil interferes. Devil wants between the husband and wife there are disagreements, we don’t live our lives according to the verses of Quran.
The parameters of love that have been given that we should be considerate towards one another, to give preference to the other. We are not able to see that.
Some women we find that “I am madly in love with him”. Its not said in reference to love (in the Quran) that we become crazy. There should be balance in love. There should be congruity. Because who should we love the most? Allah.
These are channels to Allah and means to build my hereafter. Some people are so deep in their love of their husband that in it she has become a patient of depression, all investment is towards that. Whatever he asks she does. Whatever he eats she eats. Is the food permissible or impermissable? There is no form of balance. One is unable to control things in mature way. So this is also not prescribed.
‘Love’ is according to the Quran and Sunnah.
and He placed between you love and mercy.” (30:21)
When we love someone, look in your own home. Suppose you love your friend. What do you do? Your friend came to your house. You really love her. Or she is your cousin. You say we are childhood friends. We were always together. You tell the whole world how much you love her. She came to visit you and threw her shawl on the sofa.
What will you do? Doesn’t she know she doesn’t throw her shawl there?
If the husband did the same thing, what do we do? We are not able to tolerate this. We look into one’s own life someone else whom we love, we accommodate so much. We overlook so much, don’t make issues over small things. Because in the relationship between husband and wife the devil interferes. Devil wants between the husband and wife there are disagreements, we don’t live our lives according to the verses of Quran.
The parameters of love that have been given that we should be considerate towards one another, to give preference to the other. We are not able to see that.
Some women we find that “I am madly in love with him”. Its not said in reference to love (in the Quran) that we become crazy. There should be balance in love. There should be congruity. Because who should we love the most? Allah.
These are channels to Allah and means to build my hereafter. Some people are so deep in their love of their husband that in it she has become a patient of depression, all investment is towards that. Whatever he asks she does. Whatever he eats she eats. Is the food permissible or impermissable? There is no form of balance. One is unable to control things in mature way. So this is also not prescribed.
‘Love’ is according to the Quran and Sunnah.
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