At work today, one of our colleagues was moving away, and the only lady on our team put together a very nice farewell event incl. bagels & doughnuts for breakfast, light lunch, and after hours feast; whilst waiting to pick up lunch, a young mother left her son, 2-3 years old at most, in his pram next to me, and with a smile at me before nipping out; I tried to interact with the child, and all he did was stare at me with no reaction, granted I am not the most child friendly in the neighbourhood, but not the worse either. After multiple, if unsuccessful attempts on my part, a lady seated on the opposite corner of the restaurant popped over, and it was as if he saw Gabriel in the flesh: cackles, giggles, gibber-gabber, laughter, the works. The lady behind the counter joined the funfare, and on it went. A couple of other blokes, too in waiting, and I glanced at each other in acknowledgement. There was more, but I am cutting the story short to get to the theory.
At that moment, a theory formed in my head: boys who do not grow up with fathers, do not know how to act round men, and vice versa, and then I carried out an impromptu experiment, non-scientific of course, running the idea by the people in the restaurant. The result was congruous, if split. Now, before I share the results, allow me to expand the theory.
Most, not all, young men, who imply, express, or engage in unfavourable, if hostile discourse about women have grown up in households, where women were not regarded outstanding, more of doormats, if impaired in value; in other words, women in their lives, be it mothers, sisters, cousins etc. were deemed more lacking than not, and therefore carry negative attitudes towards women, and grow up to be glorified misogynists.
Equally, young women, who behold, if beguile unfavourable views about men, have very likely grown up in households where men in their lives were either missing, had no role in their upbringing, were abusive, or violent towards them, or were easy pickings to stampede all over; in other words, men in their lives had been more than lacking, and grow up to be beatified misandrists.
Now, like all theories, there are exceptions on the boundaries of the theory, some of which I did consider, and shall share in time.
By all means, critique, or even rubbish the theory, but try to be constructive, reflective, and frank; what say you?
At that moment, a theory formed in my head: boys who do not grow up with fathers, do not know how to act round men, and vice versa, and then I carried out an impromptu experiment, non-scientific of course, running the idea by the people in the restaurant. The result was congruous, if split. Now, before I share the results, allow me to expand the theory.
Most, not all, young men, who imply, express, or engage in unfavourable, if hostile discourse about women have grown up in households, where women were not regarded outstanding, more of doormats, if impaired in value; in other words, women in their lives, be it mothers, sisters, cousins etc. were deemed more lacking than not, and therefore carry negative attitudes towards women, and grow up to be glorified misogynists.
Equally, young women, who behold, if beguile unfavourable views about men, have very likely grown up in households where men in their lives were either missing, had no role in their upbringing, were abusive, or violent towards them, or were easy pickings to stampede all over; in other words, men in their lives had been more than lacking, and grow up to be beatified misandrists.
Now, like all theories, there are exceptions on the boundaries of the theory, some of which I did consider, and shall share in time.
By all means, critique, or even rubbish the theory, but try to be constructive, reflective, and frank; what say you?
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