LADIES ONLY TOPIC: "Hijab" or Scarf? Let's discuss modest attire and behaviour

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

I am not trying to judge, but something that has always baffled me, is why Muslim ladies wear tight clothes and then wrap a cloth around their heads. It's not even modest.

I don't want to post images, so please use your imagination.

And then we have the ones that combine this outfit, with seductive dancing and lip synching. By nature, women are seductive without even doing anything, so what's this? Do women know they are out here arousing men? Isn't this zina by proxy??

We need to hold each other accountable walahi.


I wish Muslim ladies who are into fashion, at least combine scarves with MODEST attire, before they finally enter the road to real hijab. Leave the seductive garb and attire for your man, AT HOME.

 

[Salma813]

I am not trying to judge, but something that has always baffled me, is why Muslim ladies wear tight clothes and then wrap a cloth around their heads. It's not even modest.

I don't want to post images, so please use your imagination.

And then we have the ones that combine this outfit, with seductive dancing and lip synching. By nature, women are seductive without even doing anything, so what's this? Do women know they are out here arousing men? Isn't this zina by proxy??

We need to hold each other accountable walahi.


I wish Muslim ladies who are into fashion, at least combine scarves with MODEST attire, before they finally enter the road to real hijab. Leave the seductive garb and attire for your man, AT HOME.

what’s the point of this post? Saying women by nature is seductive is actually insane. I hate women like you who are on this self righteous high ground who think it’s okay to police women.
you and the men who try to shame women are the worst people in society. It’s not women’s job to worry about whether they are arousing men. How are you going to blame women for men disgusting lack of self control??
This is the most judgmental post I’ve seen and you’re not helping anybody with this nonsense

 

[DojaKhat]

what’s the point of this post? Saying women by nature is seductive is actually insane. I hate women like you who are on this self righteous high ground who think it’s okay to police women.
you and the men who try to shame women are the worst people in society. It’s not women’s job to worry about whether they are arousing men. How are you going to blame women for men disgusting lack of self control??
This is the most judgmental post I’ve seen and you’re not helping anybody with this nonsense
View attachment 319290

She's right overall, whether you want to hear it or not.

There really is no point in covering your hair if your curves are abundantly visible.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

what’s the point of this post? Saying women by nature is seductive is actually insane. I hate women like you who are on this self righteous high ground who think it’s okay to police women.
you and the men who try to shame women are the worst people in society. It’s not women’s job to worry about whether they are arousing men. How are you going to blame women for men disgusting lack of self control??
This is the most judgmental post I’ve seen and you’re not helping anybody with this nonsense
View attachment 319290

First of all, I have the right to give advice on any topic I want. Anyone who doesn't like it, is free to ignore said advice.

Secondly, women are qaali by nature, and do possess the power of femininity and by extension, seduction, and that is something that all men do not deserve to witness. I think that men need to pay (via marriage), in order to get access to a woman's divine femininity.

Thirdly, some women DO, purposefully, display their assets, in order to attract attention, and then knowingly, or unknowingly arouse the wrong kind of attention. My main issue with this, is again, why do these men deserve this? Why are women lowering their inherent value? And can women take responsibility for the parts they play in life.

I also take issue with men, who purposefully wear revealing clothing, like those perverts with dick-print trousers. They know what they're doing.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

She's right overall, whether you want to hear it or not.

There really is no point in covering your hair if your curves are abundantly visible.

Isn't it better to just dress how you want? Instead of pretending a cloth around your head is 'hijab'. It's offensive to the hijab. And it's one of the social ills that has arisen from people being scared of society and their parents, instead of having love for themselves and for Allah SWT.

 

[DojaKhat]

Isn't it better to just dress how you want? Instead of pretending a cloth around your head is 'hijab'. It's offensive to the hijab. And it's one of the social ills that has arisen from people being scared of society and their parents, instead of having love for themselves and for Allah SWT.

Exactly!

I believe the problem lies in the lens the Muslim community views hijab to begin with.

The order in my opinion should be:

Instill a sense of modesty --> Wear what would be considered modest in a Western context (like baggy jeans and long sleeve button up shirts for example) --> Wear abaya or some other maxi dress/skirt --> Finally, consider the hijab (only once you've cleared the previous stages)

 

[Salma813]

She's right overall, whether you want to hear it or not.

There really is no point in covering your hair if your curves are abundantly visible.

She's right overall, whether you want to hear it or not.

There really is no point in covering your hair if your curves are abundantly visible.

She's right overall, whether you want to hear it or not.

There really is no point in covering your hair if your curves are abundantly visible.

The reason why you see so many somali girls dressing with hijab and tight clothes is because we are raised to wear the hijab by virtue. This is why so many of them don’t really care about the hijab at all.
The problem is within somali culture and the fact that so many of us don’t get to choose whether we wear the hijab. Y’all don’t want to address the core problem but want to shame women!!

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

The reason why you see


The reason why you see so many somali girls dressing with hijab and tight clothes is because we are raised to wear the hijab by virtue. This is why so many of them don’t really care about the hijab at all.
The problem is within somali culture and the fact that so many of us don’t get to choose whether we wear the hijab. Y’all don’t want to address the core problem but want to shame women!!

Of course the root cause is how hijab was introduced to girls. And that's 100% on the parents. That said, at some point in life, we must take responsibility for ourself?

As for 'shaming' commentary, abayo, we must name and shame poor conduct. I didn't call people out by name, I didn't post pictures or videos.

 

[DojaKhat]

@𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒

Remember when Dina Tokio got verbally abused all over her socials for taking off her headscarf even though she's the only Muslim female influencer out there who actually practices modest fashion?​

But they said nothing about her equally popular counterpart at the time, Habiba Da Silva, who quite literally dresses like a Kardashian, with a small scarf on her head. Places a lot of emphasis on her exotic Latino sexuality as well in her posts.

There is something deeply wrong about how hijab is viewed and treated by broader society that is not loyal to how it's meant to be viewed and treated.

For reference, this is how Habiba dresses.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Exactly!

I believe the problem lies in the lens the Muslim community views hijab to begin with.

The order in my opinion should be:

Instill a sense of modesty --> Wear what would be considered modest in a Western context (like baggy jeans and long sleeve button up shirts for example) --> Wear abaya or some other maxi dress/skirt --> Finally, consider the hijab (only once you've cleared the previous stages)

I love the steps you outlined, and I think that's how people should raise their children. Start slowly, by showing them what modest attire is, allowing them to choose their own outfits. And then slowly, they will embrace the right clothes.

 

[Salma813]

Isn't it better to just dress how you want? Instead of pretending a cloth around your head is 'hijab'. It's offensive to the hijab. And it's one of the social ills that has arisen from people being scared of society and their parents, instead of having love for themselves and for Allah SWT.

Is it really that easy lol??

The delusion is crazy

I believe so many Somali girls would dress how they wanted if they social pressure to wear hijab wasnt so great especially with women like you and men

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Is it really that easy lol??

The delusion is crazy

I believe so many Somali girls would dress how they wanted if they social pressure to wear hijab wasnt so great especially with women like you and men


View attachment 319294

I said;

I wish Muslim ladies who are into fashion, at least combine scarves with MODEST attire, before they finally enter the road to real hijab.

Clearly outlining, that women need to take a JOURNEY into wearing hijab. At no point did I say the hijab should be forced upon them. I will never apologise for taking GREAT ISSUE with women calling their scanty outfits 'hijab'. It's bullshit, and we all know it.

Finally, more unsolicited advice; it would serve you well to know how to respond to people in a polite manner.

 

[DojaKhat]

Is it really that easy lol??

The delusion is crazy

I believe so many Somali girls would dress how they wanted if they social pressure to wear hijab wasnt so great especially with women like you and men


View attachment 319294

That's essentially what @𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒 and I are arguing.

We are saying that the Muslim community does indeed place too much pressure on women, and on the wrong things. For us to honour our deen correctly, we need to change the outlook men (and hating women) have on hijab/modesty, is what is being said here.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

That's essentially what @𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒 and I are arguing.

We are saying that the Muslim community does indeed place too much pressure on women, and on the wrong things. For us to honour our deen correctly, we need to change the outlook men (and hating women) have on hijab/modesty, is what is being said here.

I have an example of this sis.

I have a friend whose mother never forced hijab on her, she ended up embracing it herself.
Meanwhile, I know girls whose mothers FORCED them, who ended up taking it off, or as we know now, are the ones who wear a cloth on their head combined with immodest attire.

 

[DojaKhat]

I have an example of this sis.

I have a friend whose mother never forced hijab on her, she ended up embracing it herself.
Meanwhile, I know girls whose mothers FORCED them, who ended up taking it off, or as we know now, are the ones who wear a cloth on their head combined with immodest attire.

Making a commandment of Allah (SWT) into a cultural aspect is truly reductive.

They do it because the same way a Japanese person can't really explain while Kimono is worn in their culture, they can't really explain the purpose of their "hijab" without it sounding like they are regurgitating the definition of hijab that has been forced upon them by someone else.

 

[Salma813]

First of all, I have the right to give advice on any topic I want. Anyone who doesn't like it, is free to ignore said advice.

Secondly, women are qaali by nature, and do possess the power of femininity and by extension, seduction, and that is something that all men do not deserve to witness. I think that men need to pay (via marriage), in order to get access to a woman's divine femininity.

Thirdly, some women DO, purposefully, display their assets, in order to attract attention, and then knowingly, or unknowingly arouse the wrong kind of attention. My main issue with this, is again, why do these men deserve this? Why are women lowering their inherent value? And can women take responsibility for the parts they play in life.

I also take issue with men, who purposefully wear revealing clothing, like those perverts with dick-print trousers. They know what they're doing.

You have the right to give advice on any topic you want, but that does not mean it is appropriate or respectful to do so.

Your second and third points are deeply offensive and misogynistic. Women should not be seen as objects or commodities that men have to "pay" for in order to gain access to their "divine femininity." Women are more than their physical attributes, and they deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, not as sexual objects or objects of value that men can "buy." Women have inherent value, and they do not need men to validate that value.

Why are you worried about women who display themselves? All women don’t want to be modest abayo. Not being modest doesn’t lower a women’s value. Women don’t have to take responsibility for men’s actions. I thought the hijab was about worshipping Allah not because we need it for inherent value from covering up?

I disagree with your viewpoint. A woman's value is not determined by how modest she is. Women have inherent value regardless of how they choose to dress. They don't need to be modest to be respected or valued in society. Women should be respected and valued for who they are, and not for how they dress.

 

[DojaKhat]

You have the right to give advice on any topic you want, but that does not mean it is appropriate or respectful to do so.

Your second and third points are deeply offensive and misogynistic. Women should not be seen as objects or commodities that men have to "pay" for in order to gain access to their "divine femininity." Women are more than their physical attributes, and they deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, not as sexual objects or objects of value that men can "buy." Women have inherent value, and they do not need men to validate that value.

Why are you worried about women who display themselves? All women don’t want to be modest abayo. Not being modest doesn’t lower a women’s value. Women don’t have to take responsibility for men’s actions. I thought the hijab was about worshipping Allah not because we need it for inherent value from covering up?

I disagree with your viewpoint. A woman's value is not determined by how modest she is. Women have inherent value regardless of how they choose to dress. They don't need to be modest to be respected or valued in society. Women should be respected and valued for who they are, and not for how they dress.

I can't speak for Puntite, but I choose to deal with how things currently are.

I don't believe in 'should' or 'ideally' in these kinds of conversations. Misogyny will always exist and I think we should, when impossible to minimise/get rid of, work our way around it.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

You have the right to give advice on any topic you want, but that does not mean it is appropriate or respectful to do so.

Your second and third points are deeply offensive and misogynistic. Women should not be seen as objects or commodities that men have to "pay" for in order to gain access to their "divine femininity." Women are more than their physical attributes, and they deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, not as sexual objects or objects of value that men can "buy." Women have inherent value, and they do not need men to validate that value.

Why are you worried about women who display themselves? All women don’t want to be modest abayo. Not being modest doesn’t lower a women’s value. Women don’t have to take responsibility for men’s actions. I thought the hijab was about worshipping Allah not because we need it for inherent value from covering up?

I disagree with your viewpoint. A woman's value is not determined by how modest she is. Women have inherent value regardless of how they choose to dress. They don't need to be modest to be respected or valued in society. Women should be respected and valued for who they are, and not for how they dress.

Firstly, Allah SWT, has commanded that women must cover themselves and that only after marriage, is a man able to see her beauty. Her beauty is for herself, her family/mahrem and her husband. It's not 'misogynist' or 'offensive', it's Islam.

I never said that women don't have inherent value, I have always maintained that women are qaali and as such, qaali means that not everyone has access to your presence, let alone can catch a glimpse of you in your full regalia.

Thirdly, again, I don't force hijab on everyone. I take issue with those that put a cloth on their head and call it hijab. Not once did I say that all women must wear hijab.

Fourthly, again, women have inherent value, and have you ever seen the most valuable people in life, accessible to everyone?? I think not.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

I can't speak for Puntite, but I choose to deal with how things currently are.

I don't believe in 'should' or 'ideally' in these kinds of conversations. Misogyny will always exist and I think we should, when impossible to minimise/get rid of, work our way around it.

If women truly care about being 'feminist', one of their top priorities is fighting the male gaze.

Most of the fashion and makeup trends they follow, are peddled by White Khaniis men. Not to mention the White straight men, who work in advertising, who train women how to dress and behave.

That's why there are segments of feminists, who even go as far as to repulse men, because they are fighting these sexist ideals projected onto them.

The modern entertainment industry, even trains women to act and dress like sex kittens. One look at the modern-day 'night out' looks like a stroll in the red light district. Meanwhile the men are fully dressed. What happened to equality? Why aren't the men half-dressed.

 

[Salma813]

I said;



Clearly outlining, that women need to take a JOURNEY into wearing hijab. At no point did I say the hijab should be forced upon them. I will never apologise for taking GREAT ISSUE with women calling their scanty outfits 'hijab'. It's bullshit, and we all know it.

Finally, more unsolicited advice; it would serve you well to know how to respond to people in a polite manner.

I believe that women should be free to dress however they want, and they should not be pressured or forced to wear any specific clothing. Hijab should be a personal choice, and it should be a choice made for religious purposes instead of cultural or societal pressure. if hijab if a journey, then why take issue with women who are trying to be modest but don’t fit your ideal. They are obviously trying but y’all want to hand out judgment like you are gods.

I wasn’t being rude whether you like or not you are regurgitating sexist talking points and you talking about women having “divine femininity” doesn’t make it less misguided and misogynistic