Isn't shukaansi haram?

[Daacad90]

Ironically my super duper religious mum keeps asking me if I met a 'decent' guy to marry. She keeps telling me that I am 19 and that when she was my age she used to shukaansi all guys in the town. I told her that shukaansi was haram. She told me that it is not haram if you don't elope together and is only on the basis of getting to know each other What do you guys think, is shukaansi haram?

 

[Teflon]

Ironically my super duper religious mum keeps asking me if I met a 'decent' guy to marry. She keeps telling me that I am 19 and that when she was my age she used to shukaansi all guys in the town. I told her that shukaansi was haram. She told me that it is not haram if you don't elope together and is only on the basis of getting to know each other What do you guys think, is shukaansi haram?

your 19
why does your mum want u to marry someone

 

[Macalin M]

your 19
why does your mum want u to marry someone

You’re 15 soon. You need to marry soon g

 

[Daacad90]

your 19
why does your mum want u to marry someone

ma aqani. She's even investing thousands of pounds for my 'aroos' I already told her I don't want one and would prefer to buy a house or something instead.

 

[Teflon]

ma aqani. She's even investing thousands of pounds for my 'aroos' I already told her I don't want one and would prefer to buy a house or something instead.

your too young fam she needs to stop

 

[Medulla]

No it isn't why would it be ? You are allowed to talk to eachother , you talk to other people regularly why treat this any different. Don't make the deen harder than it already is , just avoid the haram and you are good.

Now onto more important things your 19?

 

[Samaalic Era]

Shuukansi is Xaram. Only Arranged marriage walal. Thats the Prophetic way

 

[Macalin M]

Shuukansi is Xaram. Only Arranged marriage walal. Thats the Prophetic way

@beenleey @Céleste

 

[Daacad90]

Shuukansi is Xaram. Only Arranged marriage walal. Thats the Prophetic way

Can you explain what an arranged marriage is? Like does it mean I don't meet my husband face to face until the wedding?

 

[Kamma]

Ironically my super duper religious mum keeps asking me if I met a 'decent' guy to marry. She keeps telling me that I am 19 and that when she was my age she used to shukaansi all guys in the town. I told her that shukaansi was haram. She told me that it is not haram if you don't elope together and is only on the basis of getting to know each other What do you guys think, is shukaansi haram?

That's what my mum says. She comes into my bedroom and exclaims girls my age are married and have 4 children. I say I'm still young. She says go do dome flirting but no ajanabis. I say there ain't any decent somali around here. I say I would like to have an arranged marriage but my mum was shocked and said I don't make sense.

 

[Tukraq]

No it’s completely halal, stop with the gay agenda

 

[Samaalic Era]

Can you explain what an arranged marriage is? Like does it mean I don't meet my husband face to face until the wedding?

In Arranged marriages your family find someone and they bring them to the home. You can then converse with the presense of a Mahram and that doesnt mean someone sitting there with you but family present.

You can then accept or reject

 

[Tukraq]

your too young fam she needs to stop

19 ain’t too young wtf

 

[Daacad90]

your too young fam she needs to stop

Too young? My mum says she wants me to be married when I reach 20 cause thats the age when she got married.

 

[Samaalic Era]

@Tukraq

 

[Daacad90]

No it isn't why would be ? You are allowed to talk to eachother , you talk to other people regularly why treat this any different. Don't make the deen harder than it already is , just avoid the haram and you are good.

Now onto more important things your 19?

Yes 19 how old are you xbbti?

 

[Odkac WRLD]

Can you explain what an arranged marriage is? Like does it mean I don't meet my husband face to face until the wedding?

For us Somalis, this is how it goes...
Your parents talk to other people in the community/ in their network.
They find some decent hard working dude (hopefully)
Introduce the two
Talk on the phone
If you like the guy y’all maybe meet up with chaperone (Starbucks or dinner/lunch with chaperone, or meeting family )
If both are into it boom aroos, if you don’t then the guy won’t pass the phone talk phases

 

[Medulla]

Can you explain what an arranged marriage is? Like does it mean I don't meet my husband face to face until the wedding?

"Arranged marriage: Both participants give their full consent and enter the marriage willingly.

Forced marriage: One or both participants enter the marriage without giving their consent. They go through with the wedding under duress from their families."

Most Somali arranged marriages are just the parents introducting a suitable person and then you marrying them. However, you still date and talk to eachother to see if it will work. What the West considers dating is different to what we do in Islam . Some of you here mix forced marriages with arranged marriages

 

[Macalin M]

I like talking to ladies, alone! I don’t want no creepy guy staring at me. Plus if it’s in public technically there’s hundreds of mahrams

 

[beenleey]

@beenleey @Céleste

I'm a gaal. Xaran baan ka ahaay. He's for the other Sacad/HG girls to deal with