Sometimes, Somali men/boys make the mistake of marrying a woman that is beneath him. Worse; a woman that is beneath him and a non-Somali which makes it even worse. Either it's a test or a mistake that could have been avoided.
The following is my opinion; feel free to disagree;
(If this misfortune befell you or you are in it, it's never too late to start over, don't raise children in a toxic environment.)
Follow the Sunnah/Allah's laws, as Allah knows what is best for us;
Please know your worth. You are Allah SWT's creation, this means you are worthy of everything that is good.
Furthermore, you have the most high as your ally.
Allah said; ask and I will give you, therefore, utilise Duah, it is the most powerful tool of a Muslim.
However, you must BELIEVE!!! So be careful of this powerful tool as you WILL GET WHAT YOU ASK FOR/THINK YOU DESERVE.
If you THINK you deserve a bad woman, you will get a bad woman; it is as simple as this.
The following is my opinion; feel free to disagree;
(If this misfortune befell you or you are in it, it's never too late to start over, don't raise children in a toxic environment.)
Follow the Sunnah/Allah's laws, as Allah knows what is best for us;
- Lower your gaze! Don't develop crushes on random women, she could be crazy, lesbian, abusive or both. The point is, the way someone looks is NOT indicative of their character.
- Always involve your family/loved ones/respected people from the beginning of your 'courting process'. They have a clearer head/more experience than you do. Trust them.
- DON'T spend time alone in a secluded place with a strange woman, she can accuse you of rape you or ruin your reputation with lies, hence involving your loved ones is key.
- IF they approve; do ISTIKHAARAH PROPERLY and go with your gut.
- You have emotional intelligence ! If you sense "crazy", she is crazy: RUN.
- Don't listen to words; look at his actions.
- IF she is Ajnabi, make sure she is better than any Somali woman you will ever meet/have ever met. Marrying a foreigner is not easy and no, it is NOT haram to turn down a muslim, compatibility is very important so being from the same country/culture is critical!
Please know your worth. You are Allah SWT's creation, this means you are worthy of everything that is good.
Furthermore, you have the most high as your ally.
Allah said; ask and I will give you, therefore, utilise Duah, it is the most powerful tool of a Muslim.
However, you must BELIEVE!!! So be careful of this powerful tool as you WILL GET WHAT YOU ASK FOR/THINK YOU DESERVE.
- Self-care- physical, emotional, mental; this means work out, eat well, pray/meditate, get an education/job etc.
- Find yourself- this sounds cliche but it's important, if you don't know yourself, you don't know what makes you happy.
- Learn your rights as a Muslim man/rights of a Muslim woman.
- Find a halal stream of income; a strong man becomes a strong husband/father.
- Enhance your strength, remember a Muslim man has to be strong; maybe have 2 cars; one for week days and one for weekends
If you THINK you deserve a bad woman, you will get a bad woman; it is as simple as this.
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I enjoyed the read though, it's hilarious.
