Hell and Psychosis

I want to explain to you guys that I know exactly when I am in psychosis. I don't say things for the sake of it. I am in psychosis when my eyes go red as blood all over, when my head inside is boiling inside with fire. It literally feels like hellfire is all over my brain. I think that's what hell is not physical place, it's just your brain is on fire and all your body is in pain and you never get out. I think it's psychosis is hell and it's terrible place. So IF you ever see me ranting to myself, I am talking to the devil again and you need to stop me immediately.

Tell me to take my amisulpride medications and go to sleep because god is happiness and cools your brain down and makes you experience happiness and if that aint happening your in hell niyahow. I went pretty deep sxb to hell, I was in a hypocrit section of hell. I am proud of how strong I am, wallahi most people would've of suicided long ago if they knew what I was experiencing but I don't like to brag about my strength, it just reminds me there is nothing on earth that is going to match that hellish place I went to. It's place of torment but you can handle the torment sxb if your strong enough, I can handle torment, I just realized today on my walk on the nature strip. I can't handle despair though and losing hope there is better days over the horizon and to power on, once that kicks in. I am very much on suicide watch because that's the only time I think of suicide is when I lost all hope that I will recover from psychosis and I feel I am stuck in madness and it's never-ending maze.

Hell is a never-ending maze, every corner you go your head is on fire inside and you think you will see some answer to get you out but you never do and then you give up and say there is no-way I am leaving this what do I do and then suicide comes to thought. I actually strangled myself in the hospital also when despair kicked in and I cried to my aunty that I can't handle it anymore, despair is all over this now and I need to get out of life.

The only time the DR will suicide is when I see no more hope, till then I can power on in life. If I ever see no hope in any job or situation I am in, I am walking out bro. There is no point continuing anymore and it will just add damage to your health and morale and this will trigger a chain effect on the rest of your life like social, financial, hobbies, and will impact on your life.

The Devil told me in psychosis and yes he isn't a bad person, he also wants to help you so you help him out with a few prayers when you get out, I cut that deal with him. If you let me go, I will do my hardest to ask for your forgiveness if god lets me into his gate of heaven. I won't seek revenge I told him. So we were helping each other in a way in psychosis, it's weird I know. But niyahow you start to negiotate when your in hell and cut deals so you get the fuck outta there. No human being should have to suffer that torment and misery on life. Anyways I am walking out of any job the second hope isn't there. I have prepared income protection and will use a health reason to take time off from work while I find another job to ensure my income continues.

DONT STAY BROTHERS IN ANY JOB HOPE HAS DIED, DESPAIR WILL ONLY FOLLOW.

 

I am going to listen to some Mariah Carrey, fuck that's heaven her voice. I listen to tupac when I am in hell but he is a soljah in the mind. Pac made it I think out of hell when he died. You don't hold that type of wisdom he did and not know what's coming. I know to much about hell niyahow, I am going to listen to some heaven from now on.

If my head isn't burning anymore inside and my eyes are red like a fuckin blood soaked red all over, I know I am not in hell and I am either in earth a neutral place or god forbid he shows me a bit heaven for once which is where my faith is that I get one day that reward.

Tupac KRAZY song indicates he made it thru hell.

Here is the lyric

I took a minus and now the hard times are behind us
Turned into a plus, now they stuck livin' blinded

Tupac took a minus(went to hell) he said he was suicidal in one of his interviews, I bet it was when he went to hell, now the hard time is behind him. Turned into a plus(he walked away from hell back to earth neutral spot) while the world is still blinded by his image of thug nigga he doesn't care now is what his saying, he saw hell, he is just back in neutral earth and there is nothing to bad here compared to hell. I bet he had faith in god sxb that he sees better days and a ghetto heaven after the tribulations.

Here it is the lyric I think the explanation is for around 0:49 mark to 0:56

 

The world existence is based on this formula. Hell is -1, Earth is 0(neutral), Heaven( your no 1). Damn pac was strong sxb, he didn't even seek mental hospitals, medications, etc for his suicidal tendencies early on.

I sought help through my hell, Thats pretty damn tough sxb coping on your own and then walking out of it by yourself. Nash that mathamatician did the same thing just walked out of hospital and never returned. I will be off meds is my aim like nash in a 6 months to a year time.

In hell it's not about the color of your skin, it's the state of your mind. There is switch that god places on you and it goes negative 1 and positive 1 like electricity and then there is neutral like 0 that's just death. Haven't you seen electricity you got -1 a negative reaction and plus 1 a positive reaction combining? but in the middle is zero there is no electricity(atheist outcome, just nothingness, death, no pain, no sorrow, just like you were before you born) nothing to worry about that niyahow if your in hell you want that, it's called going to sleep. If your in heaven obviously you don't but I never saw heaven so I can't speak that perspective.

A negative and a positive combined should generate a reaction(bang light) that's the reaction. It's only when the state of something is 0 there will be no reaction, it will cancel it out because there is nothing there in terms of energy or power. You can't mix positive with nothing 0 because it has no reaction it will head into failure and collapse whatever it is. Remember that rule from me. Positive and negative combine it as it has two states that are active.

 

Look at the cigarette lighter sxb, I just looked at it now. It has a spark happening, so it's taking that fuel and then adding spark to it. Cars should have a sparker too to convert that gas or energy when we turn on the ignition. Two metals rubbing against each other may create a spark. Two sticks create a spark for fire to happen in camp site. Notice they have to spark it first primitive people before fire comes or energy? You need to do the same with anything energy based. It needs a spark regardless what it is.

 

Aduunka ayaa laygu cadaabay lakin cadaabtu ma ahayn midki akhiro waa midki temporaryka oo laga soo bixi karo. I was put in hell on earth within my own mind. Can you imagine that? Hell isn't a bodily experience, your body don't matter, all your pain receptors are in the brain, so it's mental experience. Take away your brain right now your body isn't much on it's own. The body reports to the brain guys. As long as a brain is there what matters is the experience your in. You could be in a cold place and still burning in your mind and those pain receptors in your brain will be in over-drive so even if your body isn't experiencing a fire, your pain receptors in the brain are experiencing a fire.

There is no sleep in hell, you stop eating, because your mind is on fire, your eyes are bleeding red. Psychotic people are possessed by the devil. Just look at their faces and that's terrifying. Aduunka ayaa lagu cadaabay niyahow to give them a warning I think that isn't the real hell and you still have a chance to correct your life on earth. I will be correcting myself from now on earth.

There was no light sxb, no heavenly experience here. Heaven I Assume would be the opposite it would mean your mind is in raaxo sxb and calm and cool. That's barzakh till you get to judgment day and then the outcome can go anyway for we don't know what god will decide and where u go. Judgment day hasn't come as long as the hour is still continuing, we will be put in temporary places based on our life and deeds untill that day comes and then it's all over and it's going to be most terrifying experience I think we will all be paranoid running for our lives. I even abadoned my own family except my mother in hell saying I won't let her go. That was temporary hell.

I think I secured a high spot in heaven for my mother, I hope I have that's why tupac talked about his mom when he said I took a minus and now the hard times are behind us. You keep your mother on day of judgment that's why mary was called mother of god, i bet jesus couldnt let go off her either. God wants us to drop everything for him all the good and bad.

We all cant let go off our mothers when hell is on the horizon niyahow. That's why mary is called mother of god niyahow it's not cause she is the mother of god himself practically speaking but mary was more important to jesus and he couldn't let her go for god so god just said u humans prefers your mothers over me. NO WONDER TUPAC RAPPED ABOUT HAIL MARY.

True soljahs know their weakness. It's our mothers, you go to god and u admit your weakness and don't hide around it. HAIL MARY ILL SAY THE SAME THING. OUR MOTHERS HAVE ALOT OF PULL ON US WHEN TIMES GET TOUGH.

 

Dre switched to the Iluminati the east coast crew. Notice he left california? the iluminati boys placed their piece with bad boy records sxb to fight the deathrow. Know that iluminati fights every level from ghettos to academia to politics to business. It's a vicious jewish iluminati who doesn't want people awoken about his agenda to keep us on earth suffering with him cause he is cursed by god and we aint because we never cut a deal with god we report to adam and his adam apple.

Becareful of Dr Dre tupac told me he is gay ass nigga sxb, not in the physical sense, he loved the world and joined the iluminati on the east coast, he thinks happiness is here, but he is in despair cause u can still be rich and empty as fuck. It don't matter good and evil in the despair side of the world, you can be in hiltons even their will be despair and pain. Where-ever there is an inch of pain is the despair crew and it's satan. It don't matter if its good or evil. You want the happiness crew and that could good and evil on that side also because their happy regardless of their behaviors.

Abraham tried to conquer his weakness, his son sacrifice. So children are big weakness too. So that's why the trinity talks about the son of god, we tend to find it hard to sacrifice our children, we will go to judgment day with our children and mothers and we aint letting go most of us. It's not sxb a physical thing though, your memories are being reviewed here and you will cry and show emotion when you see your mother father and children that's probably why the trinity is the father, son, then a mother of god which indicates the mother is more important most people in the world so it becomes a mother of god to them not to god. It's about us this life it's not about god and we need read the scriptures based on us as human beings cause it's talking to us, it's not about god.

Notice the west hate their parents but love their kids and won't let go. Poorer countries love their parents first especially mothers and wont let go lol. We all going to go with either our mothers or childrens and he is gonna do huge sacrifice that day. Anything on earth is the devil including us.

 

Jesus never died, he went to hell though but he made it through it and was lifted to heaven. I nearly died in psychosis, it's like your body is being slowly ripped apart with some other dimension of yourself. It's similar to this like your body is one layer and there is anothe layer below and when you die the first layer is slowly ripped from the below layer.



Ask anybody who has had a near death experience I am sure the experience of death is the same. It's like your being ripped apart and your being draggeddddddddddddddddd it's a long drag into a hole of blackness.

 

Us damiinyohow. Qashin post.

 

Tf nigga?

 

@DR OSMAN Are you okay

 

How is this a qashin post even science acknowleges anti matter anti energy which is a reaction and opposite of matter and energy and is invisible yet totally the opposite of matter and energy. Why can't the human body have two opposites in it? the soul and the flesh which are totally opposite of each other in structure and dimension one is physical dimension and the soul is a spiritual and invisible dimension.

We accept things exist in science that are invisible and not observable or measurable or testable but we refuse to accept it for the human body and reality and existence.