Do any of y'all no longer care

[Singularity]

C'mon, he's not the last man that will care about you, you're being overly dramatic.

 

[Lostbox]

Idk what you mean. 25% of my city lives in poverty. I spent most of my childhood in poverty sometimes being homeless and moving a lot. These are the males that are accessible to me.

From your experience, what does a decent man look like to you?

 

[greenvegetables]

From your experience, what does a decent man look like to you?

Idk if you mean physical looks I don't have a physical preference other than dark skin. But otherwise a decent guy is someone who prioritizes Allah SWT and the Sunnah of the Prophet SAW. Someone who's responsible and caring and understanding.

 

[greenvegetables]

Why limit yourself to black men, greenvegetable?

I'm black and don't prefer non black people usually. I just relate more to people from similar backgrounds.

 

[Singularity]

There are good looking guys in my city but they are in the drill scene or not working/studying.

It seems hard to believe they're all wannabe rappers and/or lazy.

Also, looks like you're making those ajnabi men out to look like they're better than what they are, and the Somali ones as worse than what they are.

If those guys approaching you are decent looking and have money, why don't you marry them?

The way you're describing how sub-par the men around you are and what you're expectations in a man is, it seems like you're waiting for a guy that's never going to come or you're making excuses because you don't want to get married atm.

"The Somali guys around me are trash, I haven't found a decent one yet" is a great reason to give to someone asking why you're not married, and I feel like some women use to get people off their back.

 

[Lostbox]

It seems hard to believe they're all wannabe rappers and/or lazy.

Also, looks like you're making those ajnabi men out to look like they're better than what they are, and the Somali ones as worse than what they are.

If those guys approaching you are decent looking and have money, why don't you marry them?

The way you're describing how sub-par the men around you are and what you're expectations in a man is, it seems like you're waiting for a guy that's never going to come or you're making excuses because you don't want to get married atm.

"The Somali guys around me are trash, I haven't found a decent one yet" is a great reason to give to someone asking why you're not married, and I feel like some women use to get people off their back.

You sound as bitter as they are

 

[Halimo-2018]

Money can be used to enslave you. Choose person who has adab and with good family. Dont do ajnabi marry somali atleast you can keep track in who your kid's aunties and uncles are. Good luck

 

[Singularity]

You sound as bitter as they are

I'm just tired of hearing Somali men slander online by our own.

I know they probably don't mean ill by it, but it's just annoying to see Somali men being scapegoated so much, especially when they're appealing towards ajnabi and prasing them at our expense.

And I don't think it's exclusive to Somali women, on twitter I see so many other groups of women doing it.

 

[Singularity]

There are good looking guys in my city but they are in the drill scene or not working/studying.

And, it's fine if marriage isn't what you want atm, but just say you don't want to get married rn instead of blaming our men being the reason why you're not yet.

"I could get married to Ajnabi men, they're financially stable and decent looking, but they're not the type of men I want."

"Somali men are the type of men I want, I could get married to them, but the ones around me are sub-par."

That just seems like you don't want to get married and are finding reasons as to why every group of men are not it right now.

 

[Lostbox]

I'm just tired of hearing Somali men slander online by our own.

I know they probably don't mean ill by it, but it's just annoying to see Somali men being scapegoated so much, especially when they're appealing towards ajnabi and prasing them at our expense.

And I don't think it's exclusive to Somali women, on twitter I see so many other groups of women doing it.

You've seen Twitter, all women for every race trash their men and don't lie to yourself. The guys around you might be decent but the majority are not

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

And, it's fine if marriage isn't what you want atm, but just say you don't want to get married rn instead of blaming our men being the reason why you're not yet.

"I could get married to Ajnabi men, they're financially stable and decent looking, but they're not the type of men I want."

"Somali men are the type of men I want, I could get married to them, but the ones around me are sub-par."

That just seems like you don't want to get married and are finding reasons as to why every group of men are not it right now.

We sisters have a few choices today.

Its either we share one successful Somali husband ( 4wives) ,which is not easy, or marry an Abdi who eats khat and does drill for living which he will never go big.

Or marry a abdi from africa who you would support for the rest of our life.

Or marry ajanabi with good money and a successful career.

Or stay single.

,

 

[Singularity]

You've seen Twitter, all women for every race trash their men and don't lie to yourself. The guys around you might be decent but the majority are not

The majority are, where do y'all live, I'm concerned at this point.

 

[Singularity]

Or stay single.

,

Yea, it definitely seems like a pre-rehearsed statement women come up with to get people off their back and answer the question "why aren't you married."

Then suddenly, when you're ready to get married, a decent Somali man sneaks out of the woodworks, who before that moment, conveniently didn't exist.

It's smart, can't be made about that part.

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

Yea, it definitely seems like a pre-rehearsed statement women come up with to get people off their back and answer the question "why aren't you married."

Then suddenly, when you're ready to get married, a decent Somali man sneaks out of the woodworks, who before that moment, conveniently didn't exist.

It's smart, can't be made about that part.

You are women hater i can sense it. Have you been rejected a lot?

 

[Singularity]

You are women hater i can sense it. Have you been rejected a lot?

Ah, yes, run towards calling people names. How old are you?

When people have nothing better to say they to attempt to label and stereotype others in conversation to silence and discredit anything they have to say.

You literally said most Somali men are trash and that the ratio of good Somali men to women was 4:1.

You've certainly degraded men, does that make you a misandrist, if I'm a woman hater for questioning what you say?

How does me criticizing your overly excess judgement, mean I hate all women? When did you decide that you were all women? Lol.

 

[Singularity]

You are

I think you're an extremist when it comes to the opposite gender, at least online.

You have this narrative that you have created in your head, talk about it to get validation, and never realize that's not the case.

I think your view will change when you find a good man, inshallah, whether he's a arab, somali or turk.

I was going to comment something else to express my POV, but I know you would discredit it as I hate women or you, but neither is the case, it's the rhetoric you're pushing that seems toxic towards a specific group of people that I dislike.

 

[Chun Li]

1. He's not Muslim

2. I met him before I became super practicing and we were friends and I think he liked me but I ruined the friendship and he had to cut me off lol

3. He has a gf he's in love with. She's perfect for him and they seem to bring out the best in each other

4. I can't be what he wants. I'm legit crazy and it used to overwhelm him when we were buds lol.

How did you ruin the friendship?

I'm black and don't prefer non black people usually. I just relate more to people from similar backgrounds.

I think you should try to find yourself a Muslim African American man. Maybe there’s not a lot in your area. If not, you could go for a Caribbean or any African man since the cultures are nice. The cuisines too

 

[greenvegetables]

How did you ruin the friendship?

I think you should try to find yourself a Muslim African American man. Maybe there’s not a lot in your area. If not, you could go for a Caribbean or any African man since the cultures are nice. The cuisines too

At the time I was a mess. This was before I knew how to manage my PTSD and particularly adulthood. He would do small things like drive me places and eat with me or hang out. But I was frequently gaging in maniac behavior. I believe he liked me but I was annoying like that and threw it off.

Also I've definitely tried courting with foundational black american men but there just aren't many in my city that are upon the Sunnah and not reverts that are practicing for arab validation or women. I'd prefer a black man who's a descendant of slaves- American, West Indian, or Latino. But ofc there's a shortage. I'm somewhat open to my diaspora though. I guess I'll try checking out a masjid across town that i know has a lot of black people

 

[Ghengis Kaarhis]

 

[Boogie]

Abdalla is trying to set me up with Afghan girl who I don't even know