So there is these two xalimos I am considering and both have older sisters.
Naturally I get to thinking about starting a family with either one of these two xalimos, and I thought about our kids, raising them with their families and my own. But theres an issue. Both these xalimos have older sisters who are married to ajnabi men and this kinda bothers me because I don't want my kids growing up and thinking that sort of thing is normal or acceptable. Not to sound mean or anything but its really become a turn off. And its sad because both these xalimos are very much into Somali guys and they're physically, personality-wise attractive. Its just their sisters are in interracial relationships.
I know we must marry those we love but family does absolutely play a role. And in some cases his/her family have values that are not conducive to your own set of valves and as a result you don't go for it. Their sisters are married to ajnabi guys and those guys are Muslim as far as I am aware. But I still can't accept knowing my daughter will one come home from visiting her aunt who's married to a white man and actually think that sort of thing is just ok. I feel like it would increase my children's ok-ness towards race mixing in later life.
So what do you guys (and gals) think? People say marry you're not marrying him/her you're marrying their family. And its true. So should you consider whether your future wife has direct family members in interracial relationships and would that be a turn off for you (and please be brutally honest brothers, I don't know if this is just me because I haven't spoken to any of my abdi friends irl about this dilemma)
Also, historically I know Somalis avoided marrying some groups of Somali women because their men were outcasted from Somali society for being cowards and langaabs. Whilst other groups of Somalis like for instance the Dhulbahante are very much sought after because their awoowes were the Daarwiish. I feel like theres an unwritten law to where that sort of rule applies to interracialised families, I don't know.
Naturally I get to thinking about starting a family with either one of these two xalimos, and I thought about our kids, raising them with their families and my own. But theres an issue. Both these xalimos have older sisters who are married to ajnabi men and this kinda bothers me because I don't want my kids growing up and thinking that sort of thing is normal or acceptable. Not to sound mean or anything but its really become a turn off. And its sad because both these xalimos are very much into Somali guys and they're physically, personality-wise attractive. Its just their sisters are in interracial relationships.
I know we must marry those we love but family does absolutely play a role. And in some cases his/her family have values that are not conducive to your own set of valves and as a result you don't go for it. Their sisters are married to ajnabi guys and those guys are Muslim as far as I am aware. But I still can't accept knowing my daughter will one come home from visiting her aunt who's married to a white man and actually think that sort of thing is just ok. I feel like it would increase my children's ok-ness towards race mixing in later life.
So what do you guys (and gals) think? People say marry you're not marrying him/her you're marrying their family. And its true. So should you consider whether your future wife has direct family members in interracial relationships and would that be a turn off for you (and please be brutally honest brothers, I don't know if this is just me because I haven't spoken to any of my abdi friends irl about this dilemma)
Also, historically I know Somalis avoided marrying some groups of Somali women because their men were outcasted from Somali society for being cowards and langaabs. Whilst other groups of Somalis like for instance the Dhulbahante are very much sought after because their awoowes were the Daarwiish. I feel like theres an unwritten law to where that sort of rule applies to interracialised families, I don't know.
and maybe to liberal families
