Any ladies here have ever lived on their own?

empressjamila

empressjamila

yktv
The more time passes the more I want to move out. I pay 1k to my parents for house+utilities but I’m still treated like a child. I clean up, I cook for everyone but still don’t receive the adult respect. I have younger siblings who are in their teens and my parents straight up treat me the exact same as them meanwhile I pay them rent, which makes me very angry and resentful.

I know the go to solution is “get married” but I don’t want to be one of those girls that marry just any guy just to leave their family home and end up in a worse situation. Also, the “family home straight to husband’s home” pipeline has never appealed to me. I want a few years just on my own before I get married. I’m in a good place to do it, financially.

I know my parents would flip out when I tell them I want to move out because they want me to stay at home, but I think they would eventually get over it.

I know it’s more common in our community to men to move out before marriage compared to women. Has anyone here moved out before marriage? Or currently live on their own?
 
Ozymandias

Ozymandias

Walaal respectfully, naagnool iska dhig o iska guur, maxaad ka cibaadaysa?? Your parents moved continents out of volition. If you are not happy with living at home then make your way. They will come around eventually. Somali girls are soo daacad wallahi
 
empressjamila

empressjamila

yktv
Ozymandias said:
Walaal respectfully, naagnool iska dhig o iska guur, maxaad ka cibaadaysa?? Your parents moved continents out of volition. If you are not happy with living at home then make your way. They will come around eventually. Somali girls are soo daacad wallahi
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You’re right. It’s hard to because my parents have the viewpoint that children that leave their family home before marrying are caasi and gaal raac because that’s not our dhaqan and you need to stay home and help your family. But it’s getting too stressful to live at home. I think it’s time for me to just bite the bullet and do what’s best for me
 
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empressjamila

empressjamila

yktv
Yaraye said:
Abaayo, Why do you cook and clean for everyone? :draketf:
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When I mean clean for everyone I meant common areas like kitchen/living room/bathroom. We take turns. But me and my hooyo end up doing most of it because my younger teenage siblings are extremely messy and barely clean up after themselves

Also with cooking me and hooyo take turns cooking for everyone because my younger siblings don’t know how to cook.
 
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Yaraye

Yaraye

VIP
empressjamila said:
When I mean clean for everyone I meant common areas like kitchen/living room/bathroom. We take turns. But me and my hooyo end up doing most of it because my younger teenage siblings are extremely messy and barely clean up after themselves
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Out of the 7 days in a week, how many days do you clean and cook on average?
 
a_bilan

a_bilan

empressjamila said:
I know it’s more common in our community to men to move out before marriage compared to women. Has anyone here moved out before marriage? Or currently live on their own?
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I wouldn’t recommend moving out unless you’re relocating for work/school but if it something you really would like to experience, it’s always worth it to have at least some time away from your family as a adult.

Pros: Having your own space, if you come from a large household it’s a quiet sanctuary.

Cons: you miss living with your family and feel a bit left out, no more home cooked meals. It absolutely sucks when you are really sick and just starve, it’s expensive

I don’t think the adult respect treatment happens ever… especially with your mom :ayaanswag:
 
Moon-

Moon-

Bipolar Express
:gucciwhat: cook clean and pay bills you shouldn't be doing both 1000 is crazy thats like 70%
of bills tbh you shouldn't have gotten into that in the first place its hard to get out once your in

me personally from a young age i set the standard low you have to be more selfish your sibling are too grown to be cleaning 3/7 days:draketf:.
 
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