Grigori Rasputin
Former Somali Minister of Mismanagement & Misinfo.
Staff Member
Wariyaha SomaliSpot
My husband and I have been together for 5 years. We have two boys, ages 2 years and 7 months. My husband and younger sister have always been pretty close; some people have told me a little too close, but I trusted him and always thought they had a brother/sister relationship.
So, my sister and mom had come up to visit and then take my first son back home with them. I was feeling overwhelmed and needed a break but my youngest is still breastfeeding so he stayed with me. They were only here for two days but after they left things felt off. My husband, who likes to write music, kept complimenting me a lot. It almost felt like he was also trying to convince himself of the compliments. I felt like he might have been cheating or at the very least hiding something from me. I had a pit in my stomach that wouldn't go away, so I finally mustered enough courage to say something. He got defensive, saying I was acting crazy and that it made him feel bad being accused of something he didn't do.
I know it's going to make me sound bad, but I couldn't take his word for it and the fact that he got defensive instead of comforting me rubbed me the wrong way. I decided to go through his phone to put my mind at ease. I went to his notes app looking for a password and found a bunch of songs he had written. I saw one titled “Girl I think about you.” I stupidly thought it was about me but I quickly realized it wasn't. It talked about thinking about a girl he's not supposed to, how he undresses her with his eyes, finds excuses to touch her and much more. I honestly was in shock and confronted him, and he tried to get defensive asking me why I went through his phone.
He told me they were sexual feelings he had had for "someone" back in the fall/winter time when I had our second son. He didn't want to act on them, and he didn't know what to do so he wrote about his feelings. I asked whom it was about but he wouldn't tell me. At that point I knew who it was about. I asked him if I was related to this person and he just buried his face in his hands and nodded. He started crying and explaining how bad he felt. When he went to sleep I packed a bag, put my youngest in the car and left. I went to my cousin's and texted him telling him I needed time. He suggested couples therapy, said that he loved me, he was sorry, and he only wants me, our family and nothing else. The trust between us is completely broken. I know he didn't technically do anything but it's still bad, right? The worst part is that I would normally call my family about this, but I can't. It's embarrassing, and I have to talk to them everyday and act fine because they have my son right now. I don't know what to do."
So, my sister and mom had come up to visit and then take my first son back home with them. I was feeling overwhelmed and needed a break but my youngest is still breastfeeding so he stayed with me. They were only here for two days but after they left things felt off. My husband, who likes to write music, kept complimenting me a lot. It almost felt like he was also trying to convince himself of the compliments. I felt like he might have been cheating or at the very least hiding something from me. I had a pit in my stomach that wouldn't go away, so I finally mustered enough courage to say something. He got defensive, saying I was acting crazy and that it made him feel bad being accused of something he didn't do.
I know it's going to make me sound bad, but I couldn't take his word for it and the fact that he got defensive instead of comforting me rubbed me the wrong way. I decided to go through his phone to put my mind at ease. I went to his notes app looking for a password and found a bunch of songs he had written. I saw one titled “Girl I think about you.” I stupidly thought it was about me but I quickly realized it wasn't. It talked about thinking about a girl he's not supposed to, how he undresses her with his eyes, finds excuses to touch her and much more. I honestly was in shock and confronted him, and he tried to get defensive asking me why I went through his phone.
He told me they were sexual feelings he had had for "someone" back in the fall/winter time when I had our second son. He didn't want to act on them, and he didn't know what to do so he wrote about his feelings. I asked whom it was about but he wouldn't tell me. At that point I knew who it was about. I asked him if I was related to this person and he just buried his face in his hands and nodded. He started crying and explaining how bad he felt. When he went to sleep I packed a bag, put my youngest in the car and left. I went to my cousin's and texted him telling him I needed time. He suggested couples therapy, said that he loved me, he was sorry, and he only wants me, our family and nothing else. The trust between us is completely broken. I know he didn't technically do anything but it's still bad, right? The worst part is that I would normally call my family about this, but I can't. It's embarrassing, and I have to talk to them everyday and act fine because they have my son right now. I don't know what to do."
