Absent Fathers in the Somali Community

[Mercury]

This issue is not that much talked about from what I'm aware of

First I wanna say a lot of people in here think I always bash men that's not true I've talked about Somali girls aswell like single mothers who have very low standards set for themselves and will settle with any bum

But The elephant in the room is the men in the community who don't understand the concept of responsibility nor parenting who only believe their role as fathers is to just provide for the family
Who will ditch their 7 -10 kids and wife with no regrets whatsoever And marry another one and repeat the cycle

Those kids later gonna end up gettin raised by the streets or die on the streets thats a fact

Back home things were different the fathers could sit in coffee shops or hang with his buddies because relatives where always nearby and could pitch in and help the family with child rearing,taking care of the house etc

But in the west you're on your own and can't have the same expectations and mentality as back home only here it's more obvious how little you would contribute to the family

I know a lot of good Somali men and fathers But I think as a community we can do much better and should strive to be the best we can and its important to highlight issues like these hiding them under the rug and pretend they're not that serious This will only further enable these type of behaviors there needs to be a shunning of these types from the entire community to weed them out

 

[Mercury]

Soon we Will become more like the African American community with absent fahers and baby mamas

And youth emulating gang culture

 

[jamal9]

Soon we Will become more like the African American community with absent fahers and baby mamas

And youth emulating gang culture

 

[Mercury]

f*ck off

 

[Western4Life]

I find most Somalis fathers (not mine) to be heartless. I have been around many who would call their kids doofaar and all sorts of bad names if their kids asked for candy and then they will say "you never give us any candy" and the father would strike the air with his backhand to scare the children.

These sorts of fathers are the type who will leave their kids. Watch out for them.

 

[Deactivated]

There’s no such thing as a “Somali Community”.

And fathers within this so called “Community” suffer from PTSD, many are absent because they actually died 30 years ago.

You’re probably in your 20s right now, so ask yourself if today you lost everything and you country burned down and you haven’t seeked the necessary physiological help to handle the traumas from war, how will you handle raising a family?

Many Somali mothers and father are effected by the war 100%. Every attack that happens in Somalia drains the human capital and destroys the family unit.

Somali men have a problem with stress and it degrades thier attention to raise a family.

 

[dana]

Its not the somali man, its the women aswell, Why not use birth control ? Why not spend time with the childeren I never see somali women spending quality time with childeren. They are always tell them to play outside or they bring them to dugsi.

 

[MariaMaria]

Its not the somali man, its the women aswell, Why not use birth control ? Why not spend time with the childeren I never see somali women spending quality time with childeren. They are always tell them to play outside or they bring them to dugsi.

This is so true, Somali women treat dugsi like it's Islamic daycare and on the weekdays they will put their kids in tuition afterschool until late. No quality time with the kids at all.

 

[AliUK]

This is so true, Somali women treat dugsi like it's Islamic daycare and on the weekdays they will put their kids in tuition afterschool until late. No quality time with the kids at all.

It's true. The kids never read Qur'an at home but only at dugsi and never read or do homework unless it's at tuition.

 

[Mercury]

There’s no such thing as a “Somali Community”.

And fathers within this so called “Community” suffer from PTSD, many are absent because they actually died 30 years ago.

You’re probably in your 20s right now, so ask yourself if today you lost everything and you country burned down and you haven’t seeked the necessary physiological help to handle the traumas from war, how will you handle raising a family?

Many Somali mothers and father are effected by the war 100%. Every attack that happens in Somalia drains the human capital and destroys the family unit.

Somali men have a problem with stress and it degrades thier attention to raise a family.

Yes I get you can suffer from trauma from the war But what about the next generation those who havent seen the war and yet following in their parents footsteps

 

[Mercury]

Its not the somali man, its the women aswell, Why not use birth control ? Why not spend time with the childeren I never see somali women spending quality time with childeren. They are always tell them to play outside or they bring them to dugsi.

They spend quality time at mcdonalds

 

[Basra]

This issue is not that much talked about from what I'm aware of

First I wanna say a lot of people in here think I always bash men that's not true I've talked about Somali girls aswell like single mothers who have very low standards set for themselves and will settle with any bum

But The elephant in the room is the men in the community who don't understand the concept of responsibility nor parenting who only believe their role as fathers is to just provide for the family
Who will ditch their 7 -10 kids and wife with no regrets whatsoever And marry another one and repeat the cycle

Those kids later gonna end up gettin raised by the streets or die on the streets thats a fact

Back home things were different the fathers could sit in coffee shops or hang with his buddies because relatives where always nearby and could pitch in and help the family with child rearing,taking care of the house etc

But in the west you're on your own and can't have the same expectations and mentality as back home only here it's more obvious how little you would contribute to the family

I know a lot of good Somali men and fathers But I think as a community we can do much better and should strive to be the best we can and its important to highlight issues like these hiding them under the rug and pretend they're not that serious This will only further enable these type of behaviors there needs to be a shunning of these types from the entire community to weed them out

Well in Somali community being a present father is not necessary. Just father a child. Thats all. Everybody does it. Loser Somali Fathers. Gay Somalis. Lesbians. Just a child and u will be normal in society, u can dump the child, u wont be the first one

 

[Mercury]

Well in Somali community being a present father is not necessary. Just father a child. Thats all. Everybody does it. Loser Somali Fathers. Gay Somalis. Lesbians. Just a child and u will be normal in society, u can dump the child, u wont be the first one

Than youre just the biological father and not the Dad

 

[NourUgaas]

How many of these absent fathers were banned from seeing their kids by the mother.

Know plenty of fathers who suffer from depression and taking anti depressants because the mother refuses them contact with the children.

I know of this one Faarax whose wife goes to a wedding every other night and he looks after the kids. He is disrespected by all the guys because they all say to him: Your wife was wearing this and that etc. When he was asked why doesn't he get a divorce, he says its for the sake of the kids.

 

[Basra]

Than youre just the biological father and not the Dad

Well Biological father is Biological father, there is NO changing that. Even those Biological fathers who abandon their kids in Somalia 20 years ago, now they went to retire in somalia and their kids send them monthly just because of that biological connection! I see gay somali female and gays having kids to save grace, and its working actually. society accepts them.

 

[Deactivated]

Yes I get you can suffer from trauma from the war But what about the next generation those who havent seen the war and yet following in their parents footsteps

No! They are following Adoon footsteps.

 

[Daleelah]

How many of these absent fathers were banned from seeing their kids by the mother.

Know plenty of fathers who suffer from depression and taking anti depressants because the mother refuses them contact with the children.

I know of this one Faarax whose wife goes to a wedding every other night and he looks after the kids. He is disrespected by all the guys because they all say to him: Your wife was wearing this and that etc. When he was asked why doesn't he get a divorce, he says its for the sake of the kids.

Sometimes..staying together for the childrens sake..causes more harm than good..

 

[NourUgaas]

Sometimes..staying together for the childrens sake..causes more harm than good..

If he ends the relationship, she threatened him that he will never see his kids again.

 

[Daleelah]

If he ends the relationship, she threatened him that he will never see his kids again.

Total b.s..why dosen't he take it to court?..if a man is serious about seeing his kids..he'll do whatever it takes..

 

[Boqor]

Wallahi this nigga is the biggest cuck I have ever seen I refuse to believe there is a male behind this account