A young couple who got married 3 years ago are divorcing over what happened @ their vacation N Miami

[AceofSom]

IF the dude is loaded who gives a shit. You can always get another women thats more prettier

 

[Inactive]

It probably something that built up, or she's crazy.

 

[black]

It probably something that built up, or she's crazy.

If he was a British Somali you would be saying something else

I thought your disdain for Somalis was transnational

 

[Inactive]

If he was a British Somali you would be saying something else

I thought your disdain for Somalis was transnational

This is about the woman.

Go to bed.

 

[Mudug-Madman]

I disagree with the others that it only happens in strip/bar environments, although the likelihood is higher in those kinds of environments.

You can't become violent bc someone spoke to your date. At the end of the day, they spoke not to you but to her, and yet you're throwing the first punch? That's getting into an altercation and potentially being hit with an assault charge. For what? The girl should know how to deescalate the situation. What you should be watching out for is how she responds vs. dubiously 'handling' it on your own due to some perceived threat to your manhood. It's not always a jerk. Guys may not even know that you're her date half the time, and even if they do, the endgame to their catcall or flirting is always ultimately dependant upon the girl's response, not on your own actions. Her response is what affirms your position, not a random stranger on the streets' attempts to flirt with her. The kind of standoff u described is highschool. Hothead.

Lol, many of your female counterparts would disagree. Just look at the responses by @The Cushitic One @Reign @Soulei . If you're out with your girl, and some guy tries to flirt with her, many (I would even argue most) women expect you to speak up, even if they wouldn't ever admit it. In that situation, as a man, you have to speak up. Because not only is it blatantly disrespectful to you, there's good chance your girl will lose a lot of respect for you if you don't.

Also, the chances of things devolving into violence are ridiculously small, especially if you're in a public place with lots of people. You need to understand the mindset of guys who do shit like this. They're literally doing it for kicks. If the girl responds positively then great. If she doesn't, or her husband/boyfriend tells them to f*ck off, then they'll just move on. The chances of a fight happening are like less than 0.1 percent. It's all just posturing. Once you tell them to get lost, they'll back off. They're just looking for easy targets, they ain't out here actually trying the throw hands over some other guys girl. Just stand your ground.

 

[Dino]

Lmao, defend from what?? Do you think women are so fragile that some words are going to destroy us?
It may be annoying af but IF it's harmless, then there's no point of causing commotion over a couple of idiots. The only thing that'll do is further escalate the situation and give those men the attention that they're obviously seeking.

Why take the risk of entering physical violence over verbal disrespect?? The circumstance truly doesn't warrant it imo (it's not like those men got physical with the wife or threatened to get physical); it's better to be the bigger person and walk away. As to the physical training, I don't know why you're bringing it up when there is no physical altercation in OP's scenario...and even if there was, I think it'd be best to encourage women to also take those classes so they don't need to be dependent on their husband (or male family members) to always be by their side in order to feel secure/safe.

From the words that I've bolded in your post, I suspect that your biggest issue with this scenario is that you feel your honor and pride would be insulted if other men talked to your wife/female relatives in a disrespectful manner. These women are not your children and you aren't their guardian, you aren't bound by duty to be responsible for them sxb. This machismo and bravado BS needs to die honestly.

I was about to start an essay and then i came across the below.

This is the way I see it. If someone is hollering at your girl in your presence then it's not a matter of you protecting your girl, since getting cat called or hollered at is obviously not putting her in danger. It's more a matter of you having your manhood challenged in the sense that the guy flirting with ur girl is basically saying "ur presence means nothing to me, I can holla at ur girl right in front of you, I dare you to do something about it". It's like a direct challenge to your masculinity and ur worthiness to keep the girl. In such a situation u have to step up and mark ur territory and make sure the other man backs down, or at least try your best to make this happen (we don't win every battle). If u can do this with just threatening and menacing words then good, but sometimes it might require violence.

But in a situation where u r totally outnumbered I think it's okay to refrain from acting, and any reasonable women should understand this. If she doesn't then she clearly doesn't care about your well-being at all. But if the situation goes beyond cat calling and they try to get close to your girl, then now it's not only a direct challenge to your manhood but it's also about protecting your woman from harassment/being touched etc. In such a case one has no choice but to start swinging regardless of whether he is outnumbered or not.

Thanks for saving me time. I want to share a story about an incident which involved the explusion of a famous jewish tribe called banu qaynuqa. One of the Banu Qaynuqa traders tied the hem of the garment of a Muslim woman who was in their market-place, in such a way that when she stood up, she was uncovered and she screamed. One of the Muslims came and killed the Jew who had done it. Then the Jews attacked the Muslim and killed him. too. The prophet then mobilised the muslims to expel them.

The muslim who died was not even related to the woman. But he went to defend her because of his sense of duty that muslims owe each other. The last thing on his mind was worrying about death or being paralysed. Yes he died in the end but not before he killed the filth that violated the woman's honor. And nowadays we have folks who can't even defend their wives verbally. Ajeeb.

 

[Dino]

The halal way?

How? Be introduced by family? Tried that once, huge disaster. Plus there's no one else, who is eligible to be introduced too....

So what do you suggest?

By eligible what do you mean? Does your family do not have connections?

When i say halal way i mean the islamic way of mariaage. The guy speaks to your wali. Your wali does background checks on him. etc.
When you date a man, then more often than not there is a chance of emotions arising from it and feelings. This will cloud your judgement and you will end up falling for someone whom you're dad or family will have objections to. This tends to end up in disasters.

And also serious guys who want to marry will always approach your wali. Stay away from the time wasters who just wanna chat and have fun with you. Remember. You have a shelf life. He doesn't

 

[John Michael]

Shelf life ? So much for being a wadaad. Kkkkkk

 

[dhegdheer]

You should rename yourself to auntie Menance. All you do is gossip

 

[The Cushitic One]

By eligible what do you mean? Does your family do not have connections?

When i say halal way i mean the islamic way of mariaage. The guy speaks to your wali. Your wali does background checks on him. etc.
When you date a man, then more often than not there is a chance of emotions arising from it and feelings. This will cloud your judgement and you will end up falling for someone whom you're dad or family will have objections to. This tends to end up in disasters.

And also serious guys who want to marry will always approach your wali. Stay away from the time wasters who just wanna chat and have fun with you. Remember. You have a shelf life. He doesn't

Marriage isn't on the cards just yet, but Insha'Allah when Allah provides.

Yes my family have connections, but I'd rather choose for myself.

I agree the Islamic way is the right way, but sometimes life happens....

Ps woman can freeze their eggs now and have IVF .... but I understand what you mean.

 

[Dino]

Marriage isn't on the cards just yet, but Insha'Allah when Allah provides.

Yes my family have connections, but I'd rather choose for myself.

I agree the Islamic way is the right way, but sometimes life happens....

Ps woman can freeze their eggs now and have IVF .... but I understand what you mean.

Yes a woman should choose. People can offer suggestions like family. My point is iskaillali the whole dating thing. Because dating can make you fall for someone who is not compatible with you. Dating is what i call the wallpaper mode. People who are dating tend to sugacoat everything about themselves. And when you fall for someone then it makes that much harder to make a rational decision.

In marriage you need more than just love to make things work. Ideals, outlook, goals, compatibility shared values etc etc. Without those there is nothing stable keeping the marriage afloat. And the major first argument will blow everything out

 

[VixR]

Lol, many of your female counterparts would disagree. Just look at the responses by @The Cushitic One @Reign @Soulei . If you're out with your girl, and some guy tries to flirt with her, many (I would even argue most) women expect you to speak up, even if they wouldn't ever admit it. In that situation, as a man, you have to speak up. Because not only is it blatantly disrespectful to you, there's good chance your girl will lose a lot of respect for you if you don't.

Also, the chances of things devolving into violence are ridiculously small, especially if you're in a public place with lots of people. You need to understand the mindset of guys who do shit like this. They're literally doing it for kicks. If the girl responds positively then great. If she doesn't, or her husband/boyfriend tells them to f*ck off, then they'll just move on. The chances of a fight happening are like less than 0.1 percent. It's all just posturing. Once you tell them to get lost, they'll back off. They're just looking for easy targets, they ain't out here actually trying the throw hands over some other guys girl. Just stand your ground.

And @TooMacaan, @Canuck, and I had a completely different view. Oh, what do you know; ppl view things differently. I guess the guy would have to do some digging on whether the girl he's with supposedly requires a mouthpiece and a possible altercation to 'cement' their relationship

I've seen it play out too much, and talk less of pissing contests, these guys on the thread are shockingly taking it up a whole other notch talking packing heat for a situation like this, which I find bizarre af and like a looming red alert. The fact is, things can easily go from 0-100 without indication, esp with heat involved, and now you're not only starting fights, you're handling an indirect perceived verbal threat with a gun and you somehow don't think shit will go down? Not only do I find these responses as mentally immature and an indication on how the poster views theirself, but guaranteed if he's like that in a minuscule situation like this, he's not someone you want for any haul, and certainly not the long. Least of all is the stranger on the street uttering words prone to them, but you are too.

It's a mistake to view the hotheaded response as a compliment or an indication on how a guy feels about you, and if you do, I guess you'll likely be finding out the hard way that it isn't about you, its about him.

The next girl might view it as a compliment to her, but I know enough to be evaluating it in a whole other light, esp depending on the severity of the reaction.

 

[Knowthyself]

what type of tea brought this fictaious thread to 8 pages? let me bookmark tbh

 

[dhegdheer]

Yeah @Mudug-Madman women are people with different opinions

I don't want my man to confront randos in the street either these things always spiral out of control, next thing you know you'll have ten knife holes in ur gut over some petty nonsense

 

[Dino]

Shelf life ? So much for being a wadaad. Kkkkkk

women have a biological shelf life whether you like it or not.

Moral of the story is quite simple. Do not be a time waster

 

[John Michael]

women have a biological shelf life whether you like it or not.

Moral of the story is quite simple. Do not be a time waster

shelf life
ˈSHelf ˌlīf/
noun
the length of time for which an item remains usable, fit for consumption, or saleable.



If you think that's an appropriate way to speak about women....... well......

 

[Mercury]

The issue at hand that she wants to divorce him over is that when they were walking at Ocean Dr in South Beach 2 Madoow guys started hollering at the wifey while her husband was right beside her. She is pissed because her husband kept shut as these madoows platantly hollered at her in a seductive way. ( I know the chick and best believe that she's hottttt).

This created a heated argument where their whole vacation stopped there and then.

It didn't stop there, once she got here she demanded a divorce.

She's saying that her husband is a coward and she doesn't want to be married to another naag.

Did the guy made the right decision by not saying anything to them guys when they were being overtly gaajo on her!

He could have played it off by make it seem like the compliments were geared towards him

Obviously it would also depend on how far they take it. If any physical contact is made, all bets are off

 

[Zuleikha]

What if they were armed and he wasn't. This isn't his city btw and he doesn't have any backup to call when shit hits the fan.

Best way is to walk away if there hasn't been any inappropriate touching or blocking your way. People get hit on everyday b

 

[Sixth]

> Reasoning in a @DuchessNinkiiUuriyey thread

I'm pretty sure that you could remain calm and send a firm message without having to escalate it further and getting side-eyed by Xalimo.

 

[Grigori Rasputin]

What if they were armed and he wasn't. This isn't his city btw and he doesn't have any backup to call when shit hits the fan.

Best way is to walk away if there hasn't been any inappropriate touching or blocking your way. People get hit on everyday b

What if they walk alongside her? They ain't touching bc that's illegal. At this moment should your utter something to them ?

You are right about how it is totally a foreign land he is at. If he owned a gun like I do you can't just transport it interstate because of different legal systems. Therefore I'm disadvantaged at this point but should I reason with them politely by saying " sir this is my wife, have some respect "