Definitely hire help, but I would make her cook the food and take care of the kids. Not leaving those things to a shaqaalo(unless she's a chef too).
A question for the brothers..
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Damn nigga, I thought you meant relieving excess desire, not houseworkI'll dumb it down so even you peanut size brain can comprehend what I'm saying. Having 2 wives would require that I'd split my week between the two wives.
Splitting my week would be less cleaning, less cooking, less of everything for each wife. End of convo comprende
"Relieve some of the burden, if you know, you know"
Looks like you don't know. I guess your innocence in this matter is a perk though
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The risk in that is if she married you for your money she may leave you if you lose it. Marrying for superficial reasons (wealth, beauty etc.) is a shaky foundation on which to build a marriage.
I'll dumb it down so even you peanut size brain can comprehend what I'm saying. Having 2 wives would require that I'd split my week between the two wives.
Splitting my week would be less cleaning, less cooking, less of everything for each wife. End of convo comprende
How much mess are you making?
This is the norm for the African and Middle-Eastern diaspora, so I don't know why some of the Western diaspora guys in this thread make it out to seem like the wife should always be toiling away at housework. Or is it because hiring house help ruins their fragile idea of what a traditional marriage would look like?
She could be doing other things tbh, like staying fit by exercising and not being fat(god forbid), teaching the children, having more time for her husband, etc
In times like that, scholars would advise the man to take up another if he's able to.
She could be doing other things tbh, like staying fit by exercising and not being fat(god forbid), teaching the children, having more time for her husband, etc
I read it as him having a higher libido to the point that one woman wouldn't be able to satisfy him. In that case it would actually be a burden because you'de be trying your best to not commit zina.
In times like that, scholars would advise the man to take up another if he's able to.
How much mess are you making?
I think if they viewed a wife as a loving life companion that you build a life with, the idea of someone else cleaning the toilets would be a non issue, i mean a woman can easily bring in a cleaner secretly and make sure she does everything before you come back from work. As long as everything is clean, why would you care lol.
But you're dealing with people who are marrying so that they have a woman that cleans and scrubs for them. Its also the idea of if you're living in MY house rent free, you better 'earn your keep' and scrub those toilets.
Exactly what I was thinking.
Looks and attractiveness are very important in a relationship, and a woman that spends her time toiling away with housework or even work in general, and one that doesn't are like night and day.
My mother looks younger than most women her age. People believe that her last born is her oldest when my eldest sister is almost 30.
One of your woman's greatest assets would depreciate significantly slower if she lived a stress free lifestyle.
Obviously, if you don't have kids with her yet, you'de tell her to make herself busy with something, or even hire her as your secretary in order to keep her from a mundane and idle lifestyle. An idle mind is the devil's workshop.
That seems more like cuqdad than marriage.
The men here are conflating
Having a maid with being Lazy dorito eating netflix watching obese land whale
Which is not the case
I find life there is too much to do and too little time, I hope my wife will be the same
If you marry a good women a maid will only free her time up to be more productive and more mentally happy during the day which is a win win,
Again it seems like u guys are arguing for the sake of it not even reading the posts
Having a maid with being Lazy dorito eating netflix watching obese land whale
Which is not the case
I find life there is too much to do and too little time, I hope my wife will be the same
If you marry a good women a maid will only free her time up to be more productive and more mentally happy during the day which is a win win,
Again it seems like u guys are arguing for the sake of it not even reading the posts
Give the women some breathing room.
A young couple in which the wife is at home don't need cleaners. Only if they both work and even then i'd suggest they at least cook for themselves. My whole point is when kids come into the picture. If I was a man, I would much rather my wife use those 3hrs of cleaning to actually use that time to do fun activities activities with the kids, Quraan classes, another language ect. If you marry an educated and mentally curious wife, she'll use that to be productive.
Lol, but seriously, the guys here are shaaqo la'aan. I find it feminine as usually men are not fussy as long as they come home to a clean and orderly home. Why concern yourself about how and who did it?!
Its like a woman who has a husband who is an investor and makes money through investments and doesn't have to work. Imagine if a wife complained that he isn't doing his manly duties of 'working' even though her rent is being paid!
I'de still be inclined to get a househelp. Maybe twice or thrice a week because I'm already used to that lifestyle. Might change my mind tho.
But when it comes to when we get kids, then a house help is needed.
I was actually about to post about that and frame it as a woman complaining that her husband doesn't work and the problem is that he relies on his great inheritance. Despite her living a comfortable life.
Lol definitely ask them. I'm curious as to how they'd reply.
It may be that and also them having a tit-for-tat mentality. If I have to put in work and provide you have to work hard and do your part too. They approach marriage with a 50-50 framework inherited from feminism without realising. Only difference is the wife is working in the home not outside.
Islamically the man has the lion's share of responsibilities because he is the head of the house. His status and rights reflect that. If they understood it like this they wouldn't feel resentful that the wife is seemingly doing less.
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Why would you just be loyal to one person if you were that financially well off. There’s just too much of a difference in what each person is bringing in to that relationships. You’re talking millions I assume by saying ‘financially well off’. I don’t think I’d sacrifice my desires otherwise what is all that money for.
But risking your life and sometimes health and icky side effects to bring a child into the world isn't doing less.
Women work now. We all do and obviously, working is 5x easier and less risky than pregnancy and childbirth and other side effects. Breastfeeding, sleepless nights and having other kids in the mix sounds like a nightmare albeit a rewarding one. I work a high stress job and I know I have it easier than the average hooyo that has just given birth with other kids as well. I mean I get work breaks, 9-5, weekends and breaks.
