You've answered the question yourself by saying SL detached itself from the whole political landscape in 91. The other two countries engaged in full-scale wars that caused the international community to intervene and negotiate therefore give recognition.This is the sole reason why Somalia will never ever engaged in a war in SL to get them to bend the knee as it will have massive ramifications in the international community.
You are right, Somaliland wants to make Somalia it's enemy but we don't want to. Siad Barre attacked Isaaq as he slowly went erratic towards 1991.
Somalia is pushing for a democratic nation not a dictatorial one. As the south becomes economically stronger we might see centralization and security improve. Somalilanders will then begin to enter Mogadishu at a higher rate( although you already see a tonne in mogadishu)
Furthermore, we have already seen FGS forays into pro-Somalia Somaliland claimed cities like Buuhodle and Badhan further reducing it's legitimacy. We also see alot of northerners joining the military exposing their unity mindset.
Finally the Isaaq hegemonic base is detoriating as it becomes increasingly divisive between Garxajis and non-Garxajis which stem from the 1994 inter-Isaaq war. Consequently we already see that most of the Somaliland ministers are from that subclans of Isaaq like Mahdi M Gulaid.
All these reasons and more make me inclined to believe Somaliland won't get recognition.