I am now realizing how this affected me when it comes to my romantic life. I spent my whole life trying to have a relationship with my father over comprising begging. I am ashamed to say I did the same with men. I accepted the least effort from them and got treated like by them. I wish i can sucker punch every guy I’ve ever dated looking back none of them deserved one minute of my attention.I’ve never lost my self respects always knew deep down something was wrong and I derserved better. after soul searching I’ve finally found myself. The thing is I am now in my early 30/s I’ve given up on the idea of marriage i am ok with it I see it as a form of protection with the way marriage has become i dont feel like I am missing much. I am content. Despite all this I love my father maybe this is a lesson for me if I ever have girls end up married I’ll make sure their dad has a relationship with each and everyone them if i do ever get married that is.