Teen years robbed

[SOULSEARCHING]

I wish I could go back in time and have fun as a teenager, i feel like my teen years were robbed of me, I wasn’t allowed to go out, i stayed home most of my days, especially school holidays were my friends would go out together and do fun things. While I stayed in bed till afternoon, cause i was bored and had nothing else to do & my daily routine was to clean the whole house by myself and sit and listen to my parents give us lectures. I was told to go read islamic books and the quran nearly everyday. (My dad belived i can teach myself quran, he didn’t take me to dugsi -.-). I know my parents did this to protect me and my siblings but it killed me. It is one of the reasons why I have social anxiety. I spent like almost a year housebond once were i was close to developing agraphobia Lucky i notcied and made a plan to leave the house atleast 3x a week. During those days I would be hearing voices of people saying negative things about me, and looking at me in disgust , these were people who i didn’t know from the streets. My heart use to be pumping so hard and my body use to be sweating crazy, and i would get tremors running down my body. I noticed this was all in my head and i was being delusional. I honestly thought i was becoming schizophrenic.

Anywhoooo

it got to the stage were i had to go to university and find a career, & now my life resolves under that. Ill be offically done when i am 25. I feel like i wasted my life. After that is marriage and i dont think ill want to get married or get into any serious relationship , im not ready, im scared cause i didnt get to live my own life.

hope you all enjoyed reading my sob story

 

[CaliphofCamden]

Maybe its different for women but now I wish I could have stayed home and gained some knowledge instead of wasting time outside. Sometimes you need free time but when it becomes all you do it takes you away from remembering Allah

 

[angelplan]

You have to understand humans will always complain. I used to complain back in the days when me was in Africa and now that i am in the west i still complain. Remember only true happiness is in the religion of ISLAM AND THE HEREAFTER. This world is only a test.

 

[trucel]

I had a similar upbringing in the sense i was isolated from friends and the outside world and as a result developed social anxiety too. I was fortunate as my parents didnt stop me going to uni far away and so i was forced to become independent and freedom is a breath of fresh air. However , i went a bit nuts and almost left the fold of Islam entirely , if it wasn't for god id be doomed rn. Ngl it was enjoyable in a rebellious sense , but it leaves you empty and hollow. There's no meaning to life once i embraced the typical western uni lifestyle. Nonetheless , everyone needs to be experience independence as an adult.

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

I had a similar upbringing in the sense i was isolated from friends and the outside world and as a result developed social anxiety too. I was fortunate as my parents didnt stop me going to uni far away and so i was forced to become independent and freedom is a breath of fresh air. However , i went a bit nuts and almost left the fold of Islam entirely , if it wasn't for god id be doomed rn. Ngl it was enjoyable in a rebellious sense , but it leaves you empty and hollow. There's no meaning to life once i embraced the typical western uni lifestyle. Nonetheless , everyone needs to be experience independence as an adult.

I struggled first year of uni cause i wasn't used to being independent, i relied a lot on my peers. I also got picked up and dropped off to uni at the start from my older brother and mother.

 

[elite1337]

sheesh

 

[Bo$$man]

I wish I could go back in time and have fun as a teenager, i feel like my teen years were robbed of me, I wasn’t allowed to go out, i stayed home most of my days, especially school holidays were my friends would go out together and do fun things. While I stayed in bed till afternoon, cause i was bored and had nothing else to do & my daily routine was to clean the whole house by myself and sit and listen to my parents give us lectures. I was told to go read islamic books and the quran nearly everyday. (My dad belived i can teach myself quran, he didn’t take me to dugsi -.-). I know my parents did this to protect me and my siblings but it killed me. It is one of the reasons why I have social anxiety. I spent like almost a year housebond once were i was close to developing agraphobia Lucky i notcied and made a plan to leave the house atleast 3x a week. During those days I would be hearing voices of people saying negative things about me, and looking at me in disgust , these were people who i didn’t know from the streets. My heart use to be pumping so hard and my body use to be sweating crazy, and i would get tremors running down my body. I noticed this was all in my head and i was being delusional. I honestly thought i was becoming schizophrenic.

Anywhoooo

it got to the stage were i had to go to university and find a career, & now my life resolves under that. Ill be offically done when i am 25. I feel like i wasted my life. After that is marriage and i dont think ill want to get married or get into any serious relationship , im not ready, im scared cause i didnt get to live my own life.

hope you all enjoyed reading my sob story

You’re still young and can enjoy your life. What you’re experiencing is common in many Somalis who feel as though they didn’t “live their life”. Social media plays a part in this too. I’ve seen too many good brothers and sisters who were doing well turn wild after their mid 20s and do things they were supposed to do in their teens.

Perhaps you need to experience life alone for a while and find what you enjoy before marriage. Just don’t ever do things that you feel are morally wrong because you didn’t when you were young. Find friends who you can talk to, many Somalis feel the way you do.

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

Even at this age I cant even talk to Somalis, not long ago i was with this Somali auntie, she took me out snd shouted me lunch.
she took snaps of us and she posted it on her story & my fathers friend saw it and called my father and told him, my father came to me & said he no longer want me to be with this women, she plastered you all over social media. The photos were nothing.
i dont understand this level of controlling.

 

[Zoobear]

I would say that the opposite of overbearing/controlling is even worse. Be grateful that you have parents that love and support you. Way too many on this earth wander without anyone caring for them.

 

[trucel]

I struggled first year of uni cause i wasn't used to being independent, i relied a lot on my peers. I also got picked up and dropped off to uni at the start from my older brother and mother.

Wow your parents dropping you off to uni???

Were u not allowed to study away from home? I guess your fam are controlling so prolly not