The pandemic seems to have shifted men's priorities away from the bedroom
“I regret to inform you that sex has been canceled — at least among single men, once believed to make up the horniest demographic on earth. While rumors that younger generations are having less sex than their forefathers have been swirling for years, this time it’s not Millennials being accused of killing sex, but the pandemic. According to a new survey from online dating platform Match, the vast majority of single men — 81 percent, to be exact — say they now find sex to be less important than in their blissful days of pre-pandemic horniness.
These days, it seems, men have undergone what Match has dubbed a post-pandemic “man-volution” that has found them leaving their sex-obsessed playboy days behind and instead focusing more on emotional compatibility, romance and long-term relationships. While it may seem surprising, these findings are consistent with the broader “post-traumatic growth” Match has observed among singles in America post-pandemic, one that has reportedly seen singles of all genders slowing down, settling down and prioritizing emotional maturity and compatibility over physical attractiveness. The survey found that 83 percent of singles are looking for a partner with emotional maturity, compared to 78 percent who name physical appearance among their top criteria. (That’s down from 90 percent in 2020, suggesting a second year of pandemic dating has really encouraged us all to lower our standards.)
Meanwhile, the “hookup culture” that dominated anxious headlines over the past couple of decades seems to be on a significant decline. According to the survey, “The pandemic has initiated an appetite for more meaningful, steadfast and long-term relationships,” leaving only 11 percent of singles looking for something casual. These days, taking it slow is back, as is the “three-date rule.” According to Match, nearly half of singles said their ideal sexual situation right now would be a “committed, exclusive relationship,” and two in three singles said they prefer to wait till the third date before having sex.
Perhaps most surprising of all is the fact that these trends appear to be most pronounced among men. As previous research has suggested, men do in fact have feelings, and Match’s survey indicates men are actually quicker to catch feels than women, with 53 percent of guys saying they can feel an emotional connection after two dates, compared to just 38 percent of women. Men are also feeling more pressure to settle down than their female counterparts, with 24 percent feeling social pressure to find a relationship compared to 17 percent of women.”