Marrying a Cadaan Woman


To let you in on the obvious, White women by that age, have sexual experiences. You're entering with tensions already present by abstaining from interpersonal haram activities when she will expect you to lay down the pipe -- if now -- your ass is dropped by the time she enters or during university. There are inbuilt frictions in your expectations from the get-go.

Move on a little further, the cynical realistic reading of the outcome is that such women want you to compensate for the fun their peers tell them they are missing out on. What is that "fun." Well, to let you in on an obvious phenomenon, Western women crank up promiscuity and party while undergoing higher education. During these times, as you will not have sex with her, and you are still figuring out your life, not having embodied your completely mature self yet, she will either cheat or break up. Cadaan women expect you to move in together for a couple of years before the marriage thing, and they want the conventional "boyfriend" experience for social signaling that you will not provide her, consequentially ending up with her feeling disillusioned with the friction of her culture and the reality that is her life restricting that.

By this period, the woman will expect to engage with your family, an issue since you're not married. She will also expect you to meet up with her family. Trust me. This is very important to them. Among her family, her parents will question the ambiguous role in your presence in not fitting the "boyfriend" mold that they are accustomed to, while your parents will wonder why you're around women who move too much like a "girlfriend."

Every Muslim person I know that married White people or was in a long-term relationship, lived with them, always shared a bed, and did Zina... Both men and women. The truth is, had they not done that, the breakup would be imminent.

Even after all that, the differences in beliefs in a societal context that favors hers will present immense problems when children appear in the equation. Suddenly, culture, identity, and most importantly, religion are going to cause problems. Additionally, despite the ideal compatible context of cadaan couples, divorce rates are very high. Divorce for you will be brutal. Since the ex-wife was not Muslim, your kids will now live in a gaal context with incoming kafir men who will imbue values on your children without your control. No one plans for a divorce, but you cannot afford to be irresponsible to further throw your children into the Western jahil melting pot because you chose an incompatible woman.

Another issue is the modesty problem. White women don't understand the concept of modesty. She will think, as long as she does not dress like a , it is modest, while you will have to put up with being a potential dayouth in the street. She will not put on a hijab when meeting your parents, for example. The bottom line is, that she will wear clothes that show at least some skin on the legs and arms outside, as that is their normal. You will have many awkward moments where you have to compromise and set extra conditions on her the moment Muslim friends with families come around.

Back to the pre-marriage time. The chances for you to find a White girl that did not have or doesn't want a hoe phase, that will conform to your standard, is low because she will want to live like her peers. To them, your arrangement is strange and oppressive and highly unusual, let alone perceived as stealing away her youth, during a period in her life where she is supposed to let lose and have "fun." So basically, you will have to ask the woman to change for you and conform to conditions that are divergent from what her culture socializes to assimilate with, while society will constantly tempt her to go and indulge in what is natural for her people. Later, she will start to resent you for not living life properly. It was her choice, but this is the female psychology.

Besides, it will be next to impossible to make her go through all that, as I laid out, without you compromising your deen as well. Remember, you are just one guy out of many. There are plenty of guys out there who place no conditions on her. You certainly have to be super successful already; looks, personality, charisma, and presence are not enough. You need status and money as well. The central thing is, that you have to know how to penetrate her mind where she would do anything for you if you asked. No offense. You don't have that experience. You have to be exceptional to make her submit to your demands fully. But at that point, she is not worth any of it. Plenty of better women all around. So all this is a wasted effort.

You should go for a Muslim woman. The chances are way lower for things to turn bad.

I broke it down for a good friend. Although ajnabi women are not difficult to get on a first-mover basis, there will be issues when things become serious. The brother got a child with one (someone I knew since childhood) and later told me I was right as things turned sour. So after that experience, he told me he would only go for Somali women.
I've seen it happen to some of my friends, he didn't have a child with her but they dated, and he eventually folded back to the deen.


The most misunderstood man in here.
waryaada there is this one white girl in my sixth form that i kinda like , i havent made any moves yet but im thinking of it

the downside is, i dont know if shes into me like that though, i remember she gave me a mad look (not in a good way) :ohlord:

im strictly on business when in it comes to deen doe i.e im not gonna mess about w her I'll be straight up in terms of my intentions

i just secured a aigh job w decent salary too

what yall think
Go fellow your heart and ask her out. Maybe she will be your wife in the future.