Is it haram for a girl to get kicked out of the house?

Arguing or having conflicts with family? I know this girl ever since she was 16/17 she’s been kicked out and then begged to come back. Now at 23 she got kicked out the house after arguing with her brother.

The whole family is a mess but every time there’s conflict they’ll throw her out the door in her Dirac and her all her belongings in one laundry basket and kick her out the door. Soon she leaves and then the mom is begging her to come back and apologize to her (10+) year older siblings who still live with her mom no issues. One of her sisters lived in a different state for school when conflict happened and as soon as she heard her other siblings cut contact she just did the same so you know it’s not a coincidence.

The issue now is the sister is so fed up because she warned her family that they can talk things out rather than fighting with one another and if it happened again she’d be going no contact permanently and guess what? When she moved back they acted nice to her and then DID IT AGAIN when she was 23.

To be fair I understand not wanting contact with the siblings because while they did help raise her and took care of her, they were also abusive and will side with each other over her because she has a different dad. So whenever she leaves, they pretty much cut contact and will only talk to her if SHE apologizes.

But what I don’t agree with is cutting contact with her mom even though she said it’s because this time her mom hasn’t contacted her in months. Now I’m trying to talk her out of it but she is determined she has a job mashallah so she didn’t need to stay with family and only did it to appease her mom. Now her company has a job in another state she’s applied for and she’s told me she wants to go to that state and get rid of social media, change her name and go no contact with anyone from her past permanently.

Not sure how to handle this or if it’s a good idea.. need advice!
 
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TekNiKo

“I am an empathic and emotionally-aware person.
VIP
Nothing is worst than a toxic family she did the right thing she needs peace of mind. Somalis always cling to the successful sibling.
 
Nothing is worst than a toxic family she did the right thing she needs peace of mind.
I agree but I think the reason she’s upset is because most of the Muslim girls she’s around still live with their parents even at 24. It’s better to feel secure where you are, especially as a girl.
 

GuanYu

Custom title
Arguing or having conflicts with family? I know this girl ever since she was 16/17 she’s been kicked out and then begged to come back. Now at 23 she got kicked out the house after arguing with her brother.

The whole family is a mess but every time there’s conflict they’ll throw her out the door in her Dirac and her all her belongings in one laundry basket and kick her out the door. Soon she leaves and then the mom is begging her to come back and apologize to her (10+) year older siblings who still live with her mom no issues. One of her sisters lived in a different state for school when conflict happened and as soon as she heard her other siblings cut contact she just did the same and blocked her without even hearing her side 💀💀💀

The issue now is the sister is so fed up because she warned her family that they can talk things out rather than fighting with one another and if it happened again she’d be going no contact permanently and guess what? When she moved back they acted nice to her and then DID IT AGAIN when she was 23.

To be fair I understand not wanting contact with the siblings because they’re abusive and will side with each other over her because she has a different dad. So whenever she leaves, they pretty much cut contact and will only talk to her if SHE apologizes.

But what I don’t agree with is cutting contact with her mom even though she said it’s because this time her mom hasn’t contacted her in months. Now I’m trying to talk her out of it but she is determined she has a job mashallah so she didn’t need to stay with family and only did it to appease her mom. Now her company has a job in another state she’s applied for and she’s told me she wants to go to that state and get rid of social media, change her name and go no contact with anyone from her past permanently.

Not sure how to handle this or if it’s a good idea.. need advice!
Sounds like the family is toxic, good on her, however she shouldn't change her name, if it's first name only then alright. she shouldn't completely cut off contact with the mother, maybe she does her own things until those pesky kids are out of the house and she can then repair her relationship with her mother. However SHE SHOULD cut off any contact with her half siblings, she doesn't owe them a Damm Thang. Wish her all the best
 

TekNiKo

“I am an empathic and emotionally-aware person.
VIP
I agree but I think the reason she’s upset is because most of the Muslim girls she’s around still live with their parents even at 24. It’s better to feel secure where you are, especially as a girl.
Her family needs to deeply apologise and promise never to kick her out again. Third time is the last strike.
 

Keep it a boqol

La Ilaha Illallah
Shame on the family doing this to their daughter who is unmarried. Muslim parents think they can emotionally and verbally abuse and manipulate their children as if its their Islamic right. Allah sees everything and her parents will be taken into account
 
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Shame on the family doing this to their daughter who is unmarried. Muslim parents think they can emotionally and verbally abuse and manipulate their children as if its their Islamic right. Allah sees everything and her parents will be taken into account
Not even 0.001% of the Somali families are doing this, this is 100% not fob.. they should've lived somewhere in Arabistan for sometime. Arabs are barbaric and hostile towards women, Arab men hate their women.
 
Arguing or having conflicts with family? I know this girl ever since she was 16/17 she’s been kicked out and then begged to come back. Now at 23 she got kicked out the house after arguing with her brother.

The whole family is a mess but every time there’s conflict they’ll throw her out the door in her Dirac and her all her belongings in one laundry basket and kick her out the door. Soon she leaves and then the mom is begging her to come back and apologize to her (10+) year older siblings who still live with her mom no issues. One of her sisters lived in a different state for school when conflict happened and as soon as she heard her other siblings cut contact she just did the same so you know it’s not a coincidence.

The issue now is the sister is so fed up because she warned her family that they can talk things out rather than fighting with one another and if it happened again she’d be going no contact permanently and guess what? When she moved back they acted nice to her and then DID IT AGAIN when she was 23.

To be fair I understand not wanting contact with the siblings because while they did help raise her and took care of her, they were also abusive and will side with each other over her because she has a different dad. So whenever she leaves, they pretty much cut contact and will only talk to her if SHE apologizes.

But what I don’t agree with is cutting contact with her mom even though she said it’s because this time her mom hasn’t contacted her in months. Now I’m trying to talk her out of it but she is determined she has a job mashallah so she didn’t need to stay with family and only did it to appease her mom. Now her company has a job in another state she’s applied for and she’s told me she wants to go to that state and get rid of social media, change her name and go no contact with anyone from her past permanently.

Not sure how to handle this or if it’s a good idea.. need advice!
I come from a family where I am the odd one out because my mother is different, and sometimes my stepmum makes me feel shitty for this and one of my sisters literally wishes I wasn't her sister but I have learnt to be patient and live with it until I grow older and move out, but wjat I would advise her is to heal things with her mum first, get her own house and not change her name, and deal with siblings over time. Everything needs patience and Allah rewards the patient person.
 
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I come from a family where I am the odd one out because my mother is different, and sometimes my stepmum makes me feel shitty for this and one of my sisters literally wishes I wasn't her sister but I have learnt to be patient and live with it until I grow older and move out, but wjat I would advise her is to heal things with her mum first, get her own house and not change her name, and deal with siblings over time. Everything needs patience and Allah rewards the patient person.
Thank you sis for the advice your right walahi. You’ve reminded me Islam requires our patience and forgiveness in these times even though you’ve been done wrong, mashallah you sound like a very righteous person and I only wish you the best and happiness ahead ❤️
 
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Qeelbax

East Africa UNUKA LEH
VIP
If the girl is actually being abused by her family and she tries to get help from the muslim community then all fails, she doesn’t have to live with her abusive family. In Islam, Allah swt isn’t trying to make your life hell. You have the right to leave and go somewhere safe. Your family doesn’t have the right to kick you out for no reason especially if they are the perpetrators. Don’t look at those abusive Arab families and think you are supposed to take everything in until they kill you.
 
I come from a family where I am the odd one out because my mother is different, and sometimes my stepmum makes me feel shitty for this and one of my sisters literally wishes I wasn't her sister but I have learnt to be patient and live with it until I grow older and move out, but wjat I would advise her is to heal things with her mum first, get her own house and not change her name, and deal with siblings over time. Everything needs patience and Allah rewards the patient person.
In your situation it is the RULE. Stepmother in every African culture is regarded as the most mean and evil person, but kids who share mothers and grow up together are more close. I don't know why this girl is experiencing this.
I think the west has changed Somalis and their family fabrics.
 
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Thank you sis for the advice your right walahi. You’ve reminded me Islam requires our patience and forgiveness in these times even though you’ve been done wrong, mashallah you sound like a very righteous person and I only wish you the best and happiness ahead ❤️
Tysm habibti
 
Arguing or having conflicts with family? I know this girl ever since she was 16/17 she’s been kicked out and then begged to come back. Now at 23 she got kicked out the house after arguing with her brother.

The whole family is a mess but every time there’s conflict they’ll throw her out the door in her Dirac and her all her belongings in one laundry basket and kick her out the door. Soon she leaves and then the mom is begging her to come back and apologize to her (10+) year older siblings who still live with her mom no issues. One of her sisters lived in a different state for school when conflict happened and as soon as she heard her other siblings cut contact she just did the same so you know it’s not a coincidence.

The issue now is the sister is so fed up because she warned her family that they can talk things out rather than fighting with one another and if it happened again she’d be going no contact permanently and guess what? When she moved back they acted nice to her and then DID IT AGAIN when she was 23.

To be fair I understand not wanting contact with the siblings because while they did help raise her and took care of her, they were also abusive and will side with each other over her because she has a different dad. So whenever she leaves, they pretty much cut contact and will only talk to her if SHE apologizes.

But what I don’t agree with is cutting contact with her mom even though she said it’s because this time her mom hasn’t contacted her in months. Now I’m trying to talk her out of it but she is determined she has a job mashallah so she didn’t need to stay with family and only did it to appease her mom. Now her company has a job in another state she’s applied for and she’s told me she wants to go to that state and get rid of social media, change her name and go no contact with anyone from her past permanently.

Not sure how to handle this or if it’s a good idea.. need advice!
She’s better off having her own place. People rarely change, if she stays it will just be the same cycle again and again. Good luck to her!
 
Arguing or having conflicts with family? I know this girl ever since she was 16/17 she’s been kicked out and then begged to come back. Now at 23 she got kicked out the house after arguing with her brother.

The whole family is a mess but every time there’s conflict they’ll throw her out the door in her Dirac and her all her belongings in one laundry basket and kick her out the door. Soon she leaves and then the mom is begging her to come back and apologize to her (10+) year older siblings who still live with her mom no issues. One of her sisters lived in a different state for school when conflict happened and as soon as she heard her other siblings cut contact she just did the same so you know it’s not a coincidence.

The issue now is the sister is so fed up because she warned her family that they can talk things out rather than fighting with one another and if it happened again she’d be going no contact permanently and guess what? When she moved back they acted nice to her and then DID IT AGAIN when she was 23.

To be fair I understand not wanting contact with the siblings because while they did help raise her and took care of her, they were also abusive and will side with each other over her because she has a different dad. So whenever she leaves, they pretty much cut contact and will only talk to her if SHE apologizes.

But what I don’t agree with is cutting contact with her mom even though she said it’s because this time her mom hasn’t contacted her in months. Now I’m trying to talk her out of it but she is determined she has a job mashallah so she didn’t need to stay with family and only did it to appease her mom. Now her company has a job in another state she’s applied for and she’s told me she wants to go to that state and get rid of social media, change her name and go no contact with anyone from her past permanently.

Not sure how to handle this or if it’s a good idea.. need advice!
All these things that the brother has done are clearly sins and neglect of the obligations that Allah, may He be exalted, has enjoined upon him.

According to surah An-Nisa: Men are the caretakers of women, as men have been provisioned by Allah over women and tasked with supporting them financially. And righteous women are devoutly obedient and, when alone, protective of what Allah has entrusted them with.
 

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