improving myself

[abdi91]

I've been a longtime lurker on these forums but today I really want some advice from you guys. I don't really have anyone else I can share this with. Mods please approve this

So basically, Im at university right now and basically have no friends. Yeah I have the one guy I can sit next to during the lectures and stuff but nothing more serious than that. I've always been someone with super low self-esteem issues and I honestly think I have under-developed (or No.) social skills. I've struggled with making friends all my life but it became worse after I discovered p*rn when I was 13 and that really fu*ked with my brain and destroyed my self-confidence. Its a habit/addiction I'm trying my best to beat (no pun intended) but its an up hill battle since its just so easy to go back to it. Last week, a Somali girl introduced herself in my accounting class and my mind just blanked. I couldn't maintain eye contact and I kept unconsciously looking down at the floor like an idiot. Its safe to say I fumbled the bag when it comes to that potential relationship, but honestly I see that as a wake up call. Im 21 and I'm not ugly in any sense of the word but Its just that I have no social skills and have no real relationships in life. I don't want to live like this any longer. I lost my teenage years but I don't want to live my twenties alone and sad. What can I do guys?

 

[The alchemist]

Sxb, you need to end that habit. And to stop any bad habits, you need to take up new healthy ones. Like exchanging being a wanker with going to the gym. Fill your life with productivity and meaning, discover new habits and live your life, get out of your comfort zone. If you struggle with talking to people, try to talk to more people. Work on yourself, dress nicely, and all that shit. It's easy to make friends with dudes, just do similar kinds of things, and before you know it, you will realize how to value your own presence too. Don't be like those losers who only work on themselves for a woman's attention; chicks will come around eventually but respect yourself first.

 

[Izzy77]

I cant say i relate but i had a period which i couldnt make friends or even speak to females without stuttering. But walaal u have to be comfortable with urself and also girls are nothing too they will come and go until u find the one no need to sweat over one xalimo or to even be shy u have think of urself higher and also to be humble simultaneously

Pray ur salah consistently, repent, seek knowledge bout the deen. You will soon see all these things are distractions u struggle with are nothing. Hit the gym too