How do I get my HOYOO to stop talking bad about me to her friends

[Chun Li]

Start praying five times a day in front of her

She'll be calling you a qalanjo by next week

In a mother’s eyes you’ll be a (prospective) qalanjo. In Allah’s eyes, you’ll always be superior to a Hoor al-Ayn

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

Ur over 20?

I'm 23 now.

 

[Marshall D Abdi]

I'm 23 now.

Masha allah r u ready to get married

 

[Chun Li]

Tbh my mom is miskeen so I don’t think she would do it out of jealousy. She’s not thinking that her future actions will have an impact on how others will see me , the funny part is most people see me as a good miskeen girl - I want to keep this reputation

Aww sweetie, in that case all you have to do is go to your mom or dad & shed a tear. Cry in their shoulders & tell them you feel embarrassed/hurt. That should do the trick

 

[Jaydaan]

So basically she’s ruining my reputation by always telling her friends , my daughter doesn’t cook , clean ( exaggerated lies ) and the worst part is that her friends all have good looking sons instead of setting me up , she’s making me sound like an ungrateful hyena . I think I’m gonna have to stage an intervention ASAP as we’ve moved into a new area with many Somalis ...

Every Somali Hooyo does this to girls and boys. That’s how they banter. Hell my mum used to offer exchange of sons to her friends

 

[SOULSEARCHING]

It's not fair, I been through so much abuse since I was 13 because of cooking and cleaning and when I go to my friend's houses they were always lazy

But hoyo use to say I was a lier lol

 

[Desert Flower]

Talk to your mom and tell her that what shes doing is hurting you. Hopefully, she'll come around.

 

[Villainess]

I hate those type of somali women. I can never understand that. My mom would rather kill herself then let others find out that her child is a dissapointment

 

[Warsame21]

Remember kids. Your mother's are always right even when she fly kicks you 7 miles into heaven. She's right....

 

[SOMALIKNIGHT]

She is doing that because it is a cry for help so her friends can give her advice. She is also doing it because if she shames you infront of her close friends, you will wake up and stop being a bad daughter. Her other options did not work. She is desperate.

Why can't you cook or clean? It is not exaggerated if your mother is saying so. It is the truth. Always look at the faults your parents tell you. They are always right. It is never too late to learn how to cook or clean, unless you are over 28. If you are, order Uber Eats everyday and live in a filthy flat with other older women living the independent life.

 

[Sumaaya]

Sit down with hooyo and tell her how it makes you feel when she puts you down if front of others, tell her hooyo wax ii sheeg, advice me, criticize me, the lot, just not in in front of others, calmly tell her you don't like it

 

[Milo]

Let’s cut the bullshit, does your mom seem to be jealous of you?

Even in the slightest shape or form, jealousy can stem from anywhere. Your looks, personality, being educated, having plenty of friends or being confident enough to not let people influence you.

I hope your mom is just teasing you & it’s simply light hearted, but then again, you made this post so it shows you care about it & that you’re hurt from what she’s doing to you

no
no mum is xasid relax
my mum does the same and it’s not that deep really
its normal for most of Somali parents
trust me they’re friends don’t take what ur mum is saying 100% serious bro @hannah54321

 

[Milo]

nope its used as an ego boost and something to joke about while sippin shah

Very true her friends don’t even care

 

[Chun Li]

no
no mum is xasid relax
my mum does the same and it’s not that deep really
its normal for most of Somali parents
trust me they’re friends don’t take what ur mum is saying 100% serious bro @hannah54321

Hmm I would have to disagree with you. It’s not a Somali thing, I’m speaking in general, including other religions & cultures.

Some parents do resent their children though. They try to live through them, but if that child fails in whatever field it is they aspire them to take, they project their feelings on to their children. It’s sad really