Having kids in your 30’s

Women should be done with child births by 25.

Young mothers give the healthiest babies.
Somali women give birth well into their late 30s.

That is how many of us are from big family.

Historically women would marry young but would still continue to have children well past their mid-30s.

Expecting women to stop by 25 is dumb. Do you expect them to marry at 16??
 
I would say theirs nothing wrong with it, just make sure you get married soon. because some men don’t like older woman
 
I feel like at this point, it’s very likely that I won’t have kids until my 30’s. It scares me I’m not going to lie because I always thought I’d have kids in my late 20’s (I’m in my mid 20’s now).

How do you ladies feel about motherhood in your 30’s? Also, how many kids do you want?
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Scared about what? There is a lot of bs and fear mongering when it comes to women having babies. Tune that down pray and everything will be OK. Having bunch of kids doesnt guarantee you heaven.there are enough losers running already.
 
I feel like at this point, it’s very likely that I won’t have kids until my 30’s. It scares me I’m not going to lie because I always thought I’d have kids in my late 20’s (I’m in my mid 20’s now).

How do you ladies feel about motherhood in your 30’s? Also, how many kids do you want?
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Well I'm 31 with no kids now. But in my 20s the idea of having kids was never in my mind. Now at this age it's not as easy as if when i was 25 maybe .
 
The opinions of men and others are irrelevant when it comes to personal aspects of your life. Everything is down to Qadr Allah. Wether you’re going to have children or not is already written down. If it is going to be 3 or 4 children, you will never know. All you can do is to live life to the way it was written for you and to keep your faith in God. No one knows at what age they’re going to have children or if they’re going to live long enough to get married. The world is full of surprises so just keep your faith and trust in Almighty and always hope for the best by staying happy for the sake of your mental health.
 

BobSmoke

Just another day for the Ciyaalsuuq Philosopher
Quality kids over quantity of kids.

But it depends on the parents way of thinking.
If the parents are focused on growth, waiting with having kids is a smart move.
The parents will have less of that frustration from having unfulfilled potential.
Wiser parents breed wiser kids. Facts on facts

Besides the parents have time to have their fun until jumping in a full-time endeavour like parenthood.

However the couple need to discuss with eachother and the man can and should look more into improving the pull out game and perhaps looking into this whole "non ejaculatory orgasm/multiorgasmic" thing.

However that is a whole different topic for an another day
 

Desert Flower

Staff Member
Moderator
Quality kids over quantity of kids.

But it depends on the parents way of thinking.
If the parents are focused on growth, waiting with having kids is a smart move.
The parents will have less of that frustration from having unfulfilled potential.
Wiser parents breed wiser kids. Facts on facts

Besides the parents have time to have their fun until jumping in a full-time endeavour like parenthood.


However the couple need to discuss with eachother and the man can and should look more into improving the pull out game and perhaps looking into this whole "non ejaculatory orgasm/multiorgasmic" thing.

However that is a whole different topic for an another day
There's alot of things I need to get out of my system before marriage. But those goals are short-term anyways.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Isn't having kids a high priority for women?
Not all women. Some don't want kids and thats okay.
 

Abdisamad

No drama
VIP
There's alot of things I need to get out of my system before marriage. But those goals are short-term anyways.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Not all women. Some don't want kids and thats okay.
Walaalo.
Not to pressure anyone or anything but I think it's really important for us muslims to have kids, I have seen white gaalo people who didn't have any kids and they often end up all alone and isolated when they grow old. Some of them die alone in their apartments and their corpses are found after weeks or even months...I'm sure all good sisters and brothers can find a suitable husband or a wife.. And remember no human is perfect, we all come with strengths and weaknesses..that's why we shouldn't expect 100% perfection from a potential spouse.. In other words be realistic and have some reasonable expectations/demands. And lastly don't let negative things you hear like divorce etc scare you away from marriage...marriage is a blessing and having kids is a blessing from Allah. It is Something we should all make dua to achieve...
 

BobSmoke

Just another day for the Ciyaalsuuq Philosopher
There's alot of things I need to get out of my system before marriage. But those goals are short-term anyways.
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Not all women. Some don't want kids and thats okay.
To each their own. What they choose to do with their womb is their business.

Personally, I'm on the same boat regarding having some unfinished business to take care of before jumping into a marriage.

There are some great women that I'm gonna have to let go at some point because they on a different timeline from mine. I just hope I dont regret doing so.
 
To each their own. What they choose to do with their womb is their business.

Personally, I'm on the same boat regarding having some unfinished business to take care of before jumping into a marriage.

There are some great women that I'm gonna have to let go at some point because they on a different timeline from mine. I just hope I dont regret doing so.
I don't think people should let go of great women or men because of 'timeline'. You can achieve a lot of things with someone great by your side.
 

IGotDaAnswers

jUst keeping it REAL homie
I feel like at this point, it’s very likely that I won’t have kids until my 30’s. It scares me I’m not going to lie because I always thought I’d have kids in my late 20’s (I’m in my mid 20’s now).

How do you ladies feel about motherhood in your 30’s? Also, how many kids do you want?
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
The Marriage game has totally changed in this new era because of the extremely high standards social media has set for girls and guys. And because promiscuity has been normalised so the average guy is put off marriage and the playas are too busy enjoy all this free malab to want to commit and build a family
Couple that with the unchecked hypergamy were every girl is aiming to bag a 10/10 200k+ earner guy
Successful Marriages in western society has become a unicorn today
I see soo many beautiful muslim women of all ethnicities single.

nothing wrong with having high standards but just know the price u will likely have to pay I.e marrying late cuz ur searching for that Model guy way into ur 20s or worse, you will end up having no children 😬 you rather have children with a decent average guy than have no children at all.
 

IGotDaAnswers

jUst keeping it REAL homie
Dead is part of life, Allah will never give you a burden you can’t support. Pray to Allah for a good-looking spouse, good kids ......or none because we have ahira.
I feel like Nodaway we bring anxiety and depression to ourselves because we want to control everything, plans things.

If I can give you an advice as my sister and for the sisters here as well, don't marry if you don’t have a good relationship with Allah so the deen, your parents, your siblings (at least know who to communicate with them and how to avoid toxicity).
I had to correct you because this is truth there sooo many good people out there but that’s not what young men and women are looking for, they looking for good-looking and this were things get tricky
 

IGotDaAnswers

jUst keeping it REAL homie
Women who marry at least at 24 and start breading early have a higher percentage of achievening the national average of our country which dropped to 6 kids from 8.

I have seen plenty of Halimos who wanted to drop 10 kids and enrolled in a useless college only to end up making 20$ an hour and no luck to find a groom,I rather have a an actual human-being than a freaking diploma, if you ain't studying Medicine or engineering just forget college huuno and increase our population like our hooyooyos.

When a Halimo marries at a young age as our Lord instructed, I don't know if you guys know this but we Somalis judge Gumaays(24-35) girls and most Farah's would rather not marry unless she is paying a dowry and the groom is desperate.

I have also noticed young Halimos who marry early enjoy a banging and intacted body even after 2 kids, on the other hand a late Halimo bride gains extensive weight just after one kid and everything gets floppy and age real quick and not enough time to bread the average 6.
Facts I got a 18 years old girl patterned she was gonna go uni for some bs degree I told her “naaya hell no ur career = housewife”
I’m 23 the plan is to have 10 children by the time we are done 🔥
 

BobSmoke

Just another day for the Ciyaalsuuq Philosopher
I don't think people should let go of great women or men because of 'timeline'. You can achieve a lot of things with someone great by your side.
I agree. It's just that I dont wanna get married just yet even though they are my type.
I'm at a point in life where I'm just struggling and imma have to ride out this journey alone.
InshaAllah I'm gonna figure something out.

But thanks for that reminder
 

Sophisticate

Steel Magnolia
Staff Member
Moderator
My older cousin is a more than a decade older than me and started having kids in her 40s. Lets hope high fertility runs in the family. :browtf:
 

Sophisticate

Steel Magnolia
Staff Member
Moderator
I agree. It's just that I dont wanna get married just yet even though they are my type.
I'm at a point in life where I'm just struggling and imma have to ride out this journey alone.
InshaAllah I'm gonna figure something out.

But thanks for that reminder
Focus on getting yourself together as you are doing. I find that men with unfinished business have a one foot in and one foot out mentality since they are working to establish themselves. And for this reason aren't very emotionally avaliable to be in a marriage quite yet. There will certainly be other fruitful opportunities in the future Insh'Allah. There are a surplus of intelligent, pretty, ambitious and well-mannered Somali girls. Plus, its not like men have a biological clock.
 

Trending

Top