Arrange Marriage Vs DIY Marriage?

[Prince Abubu]

What do you guys think? Based on my experience, arrange marriages tend to be more stable and successful. However, when they go wrong, they can go very wrong.

 

[GlitzyCue_]

What do you guys think? Based on my experience, arrange marriages tend to be more stable and successful. However, when they go wrong, they can go very wrong.

Regular marriage works out as well
TBH the variables don't matter
It's all about the two people having a huge connection

 

[Inquisitive_]

That's a no brainer, you see what happens when it's left to the hands of the people, absolute utter chaos with broken homes everywhere, not even 1% of due diligence is ever done by these brainless idiots before they decide to marry.

The reasons why arranged marriages almost always succeeded far better is because our parents know us better then we know ourselves with regards to our strength and weaknesses etc. Hence they are better placed to seek out the right partners that will suit us best, they do strict due diligence checks which 99% of us don't because of a lack of experience and wisdom. (two people doing the checks)

The other reason has to do with religion, you cannot start of a relationship upon haram then expect blessings to come from it, that's why often the people who have dated the longest also divorce the quickest once married, where as in an arranged marriage there was no haram prior like it should be to reap all the barakah.

 

[Mercury]

Either way can be a hit or miss just depends on the people in question

 

[arawelo 2.0]

with an IKEA marriage you know what you're getting even if it's difficult to put together at first. Whereas with an amazon marriage, things might not come as advertised.

 

[Bernie Madoff]

I prefer ikea marriage all day over arrange one. Think about it you will notice your partners flaws after the honey period of the relationship.

Dating and knowing the person first is always important.

 

[mrlog]

with an IKEA marriage you know what you're getting even if it's difficult to put together at first. Whereas with an amazon marriage, things might not come as advertised.

Eedo it's called Ikea couse it's not designed to last forever.
When it breaks down the Halimo takes the Mansion, car and cash.
Poor Farah is told to hit the Road.
Amazon on the other hand even has a refund feature.

 

[VixR]

These shopping analogies are killing me

Honestly, it depends on you. Your nature. My family engages in the arrangement stuff, but I've never appreciated it, more the opposite. For some ppl, it works out. DIY crowd.

 

[mrlog]

These shopping analogies are killing me

Honestly, it depends on you. Your nature. My family engages in the arrangement stuff, but I've never appreciated it, more the opposite. For some ppl, it works out. DIY crowd.

Huuno laakinse don't u agree that DIY sometimes promotes cosmetic stuff like looks?
Whereas as Amazon relies on reviews and brands etc

 

[agnes]

Whichever of the 2 that comes without a MIL.

 

[ArchBishopofAtheism]

Just order your wife online like Trump. You’ll get used to each other.

 

[arawelo 2.0]

Eedo it's called Ikea couse it's not designed to last forever.
When it breaks down the Halimo takes the Mansion, car and cash.
Poor Farah is told to hit the Road.
Amazon on the other hand even has a refund feature.

eedo?

when did i become an eedo?

 

[VixR]

Huuno laakinse don't u agree that DIY sometimes promotes cosmetic stuff like looks?
Whereas as Amazon relies on reviews and brands etc

One: I think looks are important. Not the only important thing, but important.

Two: I highly resented the whole arrangement process where old men would decide their son needed to meet my father's daughter, and random strangers were practically falling out of the sky. It took me a long time to learn how to get out of those setups. I'm not saying they're not useful for some ppl.

Whichever of the 2 that comes without a MIL.

MILs are very real (evil) for some people, but most of it is a stereotype. My mom is the best MIL.

 

[agnes]

MILs are very real (evil) for some people, but most of it is a stereotype. My mom is the best MIL.

M'a that's really nice. My mom is the sweetest MIL everrr! Her MIL was really amazing too, but there are some Monster-MIL's out there too.

 

[VixR]

M'a that's really nice. My mom is the sweetest MIL everrr! Her MIL was really amazing too.

I've seen girls go so far as to say they prefer a guy with a dead mother, but wallahi it says something about the guy if you're being terrorized by his mother and he's cool with it.

 

[agnes]

I've seen girls go so far as to say they prefer a guy with a dead mother, but wallahi it says something about the guy if you're being terrorized by his mother and he's cool with it.

I'm really scared of having an evil MIL. My cousin has a nightmare MIL. She even asked to join them on their honeymoon trip. She's the one who always tells me to make a special dua not to get a MIL like hers.

 

[emptyheartsflow]

To be honest I've met with a couple girls my parents introduced as prospective wives (it was important to my parents so I couldn't say no).

Both times it was awkward, and even if there was a chance of romance, it felt too much like a transaction.

If I'm going to get married I want at least the feeling that it's destined to happen.

 

[Prince Abubu]

To be honest I've met with a couple girls my parents introduced as prospective wives (it was important to my parents so I couldn't say no).

Both times it was awkward, and even if there was a chance of romance, it felt too much like a transaction.

If I'm going to get married I want at least the feeling that it's destined to happen.

Nicca, there are like a trillion women on this planet. You mean to tell me by shear chance you'll find the one?

I get what you're saying about business transaction. But isn't marriage a business transaction anyway? I've seen far too many love/passion marriages either consume the family like a fire or cool into loveless marriage.

 

[mrlog]

I'm really scared of having an evil MIL. My cousin has a nightmare MIL. She even asked to join them on their honeymoon trip. She's the one who always tells me to make a special dua not to get a MIL like hers.

Takin ur MIL on the honeymoon is sum next shit.
How does she expect the couple to get intimate and enjoy they selves.
Ma referee bey ismooday?
Waa yaaab


Anigu insha'allah after the wedding night the bedroom waxaa la is'odhan ma tornado baa ka tilaacday.
From da walls to da floor.
Xitaa the curtains will be torn down.
Let the MIL figure out wat happened

 

[emptyheartsflow]

Nicca, there are like a trillion women on this planet. You mean to tell me by shear chance you'll find the one?

I get what you're saying about business transaction. But isn't marriage a business transaction anyway? I've seen far too many love/passion marriages either consume the family like a fire or cool into loveless marriage.

I don't believe in "the one"...

I just think the foundation of the arranged relationship is odd, and in the future you can't even be certain if your relationship is authentic or if your significant other is dragging themselves through it.